At Peace

Chapter Nine Visitor

I lay on my back on my bed staring at the ceiling and hearing the TV in the other room. Kate, Dane and Keira were watching a movie that, from what I could tell, had a lot of explosions.

My cell phone was on my stomach, my hand curled around it and I had two choices. Either I needed to make the call to end things with Joe or I wanted to make the call just to talk to Joe.

I closed my eyes.

Things couldn’t get weirder or more messed up.

It was now Thursday.

On Saturday, during the day, I’d had to have the talk with the girls, telling them I was going out on a date. I couldn’t just trip out the door with an unknown man and call, “See you later!” as much as I wanted to. I had to do what I could to make this transition from Mom and Dad, to Mom no Dad, to Mom dating as smooth as possible even though that was impossible.

I still had to try.

So I stood at the kitchen counter while they both sat on stools at the bar opposite me and I told them I met a man named Lieutenant Mike Haines and we were going out on a date.

I expected they’d both be pissed. They loved their Dad and I couldn’t imagine that, the time having come when I was moving on with life, dragging them with me, they’d be thrilled to bits.

What I didn’t expect was Kate to say, “That’s great, Mawdy.”

But I kinda expected Keira to snap, “What about Joe?”

Which was what she did.

I closed my eyes but opened them when Kate asked Keira, “What about Joe?”

“Joe’s a hottie,” Keira replied to Kate.

“Yeah, he’s a hottie, so? Mom likes the clean cut guys,” Kate returned and this was true, Tim was a clean cut guy and Tim had been the only guy who I’d liked. Then again, it was kinda untrue, Joe was anything but clean cut.

“Joe bought us dinner, told Mom she looked great in her Lucky’s and gave us electric eyes,” Keira retorted and when Kate opened her mouth to speak, Keira finished, “and he likes her cupcakes.”

“Maybe this Mike guy’ll like her cupcakes too,” Kate suggested.

At this point, I was feeling weird about my girls talking about the men in my life liking my cupcakes so I waded in. “Girls –”

Keira looked at me and declared, “I like you with Joe.”

Kate leaned into Keira and declared, “She’s not with Joe.”

Keira’s head twisted around to Kate and she returned, “She could be. He likes her, I can tell.”

“All right,” I cut in, “enough. This is a date, just a date, with Mike. Joe, Keira baby,” I looked at my youngest, “let’s just let that lie for now.”

“He likes you,” Keira stated stubbornly.

“I like him too,” I agreed and it was the truth, surprisingly. “He’s been good to us but I’m kinda takin’ this one day at a time and I need you girls to let me do that.” I leaned both forearms on the counter and finished, my voice quieter. “I’ll do my best to make good choices, for you and for me, but I also need you to trust me to do that. Can you trust me to do that?”

“Yeah, Mawdy,” Kate said instantly but she would say that instantly. She trusted me, like she trusted her Dad, she trusted us both implicitly.

Keira glared at me. “I like Joe.”

“Can you give it up with Joe?” Kate cried and Keira transferred her glare to her sister and then she said something that hit me like a punch in the gut.

“He needs Mom and us more than we need him. He needs a family. He’s over there, all by himself, he has nobody. We have each other.” She looked at me and stated, “He needs somebody. I can tell.”

“Baby,” I whispered, feeling the sting of tears in my eyes.

She threw up a hand as she hopped off her stool. “Go off with your Mike guy, I’m cool with that,” she looked at me but her body was turned away, “but I still like Joe.”

Then she walked down the hall to her room and I heard her close her door.

I looked at Kate who was staring after her sister, her face thoughtful.

“Katy honey?” I called and she turned to me. “Are you really cool with me goin’ out with Mike? I mean, you girls and your Dad –”

Kate cut me off. “Can’t say I don’t wish you were goin’ on a date night with Dad to Rico’s and we were in our old house and Grams and Gramps were just down the street but…” she shook her head and looked away but I saw the tears glistening in her eyes before she finished, “whatever.”

“Katy.”

She slid off her stool not looking at me and muttered, “Gotta get ready for work.”

“Kate –”

She stopped and turned to me. “Can Dane come over while you’re out with Mike?”

“Sure, baby.”

I mean, what else could I say?

“Thanks,” she mumbled and then headed down the hall.

I dropped my head and looked at my midriff through my arms thinking that could have gone better.

I was also thinking about what Keira said about Joe.

Then the phone rang. I straightened, happy to have something to take my mind from my thoughts, walked to it, picked it up and put it to my ear.

The minute I said “Hello,” whoever was on the other end hung up.

Mike called while I was at the garden center and told me that he got reservations at Costa’s and I should dress nice.

This was a miracle. I’d heard about Costa’s, a lot about it, and everyone said it was great (Feb especially loved it, she’d mentioned it more than once, but then I noticed Feb liked her food) but it wasn’t easy getting a table there, especially at short notice.

This was also nice, Mike thinking to call and tell me to dress up. He’d obviously had a wife and knew the drill (this was something I suspected that Joe didn’t know, considering Bonnie was his ex and they’d been over for at least seventeen years, if I read it right, though he could have five ex-wives as far as I knew). I was already panicking about my double decker night starting with Mike and ending with Joe. I didn’t need to worry about my outfit.

And it felt good, going home, getting gussied up to go out on a date. I’d never actually done that as an adult, it was kind of exciting and scary at the same time. I wore my clingy lavender dress that Tim thought was hot and my new high-heeled sandals that hadn’t until then made it out of the box. I liked having a reason to wear them, it felt good.

Even so, I’d kind of been hoping that the date would suck, which would make my life easier since I could call things off with Mike if it didn’t work out.

But the date didn’t suck. Mike picked me up and I noticed yet again he was very good-looking but this time I also noticed that he dressed well (blazer, shirt and jeans, casual for what was supposed to be a dressy night but he pulled it off because he had a good body, broad shoulders, lean hips, long legs, he wasn’t as tall as Joe but he was taller than me, even in my sandals and that was saying something). And the date was good because Mike was like he was at the bar, easy to talk to, he smiled a lot, he teased, he flirted, he laughed and he made me laugh. He was into me and made no bones about it, which felt better than having a reason to wear high-heeled sandals.

And the food was amazing.

As easy as Mike was to be with at the restaurant was as anxious as I got on the drive home, which was to say by the time I got home I was a wreck. First, he told me he would kiss me which meant, second, I had kids at home who I didn’t want to see me kissing someone and, last, I had a booty call next door who I also didn’t want to see me kissing someone.

But Mike had an answer for that too. He got out of the car and came to my side as I got out then he took my hand and he didn’t lead me to the door. He led me to the open stretch between my house and garage, out of sight of anyone but someone who really wanted to look.

Then he took me in his arms and he kissed me.

At first I was disappointed. Not long after, I realized that Mike didn’t kiss like Joe, hard and demanding right off the bat. He also didn’t kiss like Tim, hot but sweet and familiar. Mike was a stealth kisser. It started slow and soft and he built the heat. Before I knew it, his hand was at my ass, pulling me into his hips, his other arm was wrapped around my shoulders and I was plastered against him, feeling his hard body, his kiss, his arm and hand and what his tongue was doing in my mouth and I was feeling it everywhere.

He pulled away and I noticed my hands were in his hair, both of them, behind his ears and I didn’t realize I’d put them there to hold him to me.

“Not gonna thank Colt,” he muttered. “After that, gonna buy him a bottle of bourbon.”

“Mike –”

“Wanna see you again, sweetheart.”

For some reason I replied instantly, “Okay.”

He smiled and he had a great smile, even greater close up.

“When?” he asked.

“What?”

“When can I see you?”

“Um… when do you want to see me?”

“You’re comin’ to my house, Wednesday night. I’m makin’ you dinner.”

“Okay,” I said again and again I said it instantly, even though it was beyond crazy talk to say okay to dinner at his house after a first date and with Joe on the hook.

Then I stopped thinking of all this when he kissed me again. The second time, the fire only banked, he was able to build the heat a lot faster and he did.

Then he walked me to my door, came in long enough to meet Kate (who tried to be nice and succeeded), Dane (who thought Mike being a cop was “way cool, dude”) and Keira (who studied him like he was a specimen under a glass and not a very interesting one).

I showed him the door, apologized for Keira being a pain in the ass and he grinned, cupped my jaw and whispered, “Wednesday.”

I nodded, my knees a little shaky, and he left.

I told the kids not to stay up too late and went to my room.

When I’d closed my door, thrown my purse on the bed and sat down to take off my sandals, my cell in my purse rang. I pulled it out and the display said “Joe’s Cell”.

I closed my eyes, sucked in breath and felt like a slut. This was mainly because I was acting like one.

I slid my phone open, put it to my ear and said, “Hello.”

“Wear those shoes over here.”

“Joe –”

“The dress too.”

My stomach dipped.

“No,” Joe ordered, “lose the dress, just the shoes.”

“Joe –”

“Later, buddy.”

I didn’t know what to think about Joe watching me go out on a date with Mike. I also worried that maybe he saw us making out. I did know what to think about me making out with one guy and barely sitting down before the next one called and told me what footwear to wear to his booty call.

Nevertheless, I wore the shoes.

And, being a slut, I was glad I did with the way Joe fucked me while I was wearing them.

The next morning before I had to go home and before Joe was leaving town, something new happened.

He woke me earlier than I had to get up to be home well before the girls would know I was gone and he woke me with his hands and his mouth. He used them like he’d never used them before, not hard, not demanding, not greedy but gentle, tender, generous, taking his time and he let me do the same.

And after we both climaxed, when all four of my limbs were wrapped around him and he was kissing me softly while gliding in and out of me, I realized that Joe Callahan just made love to me. For the first time, he didn’t fuck me, he made love to me.

Honestly, I couldn’t say which was better, they were both fantastic, but it was a beautiful and welcome, albeit confusing change.

I didn’t think he had it in him and it made matters far, far worse knowing he did.

“I’ve gotta get home,” I whispered against his mouth.

“I know,” he whispered back.

I ran a hand through his hair and down his scarred cheek, my fingers halting there but my thumb gliding along his lower lip.

“You’re scary beautiful,” I told him, unable to stop myself and his eyes went intense but he shook his head.

Then he said, “You’re just beautiful, buddy.”

Oh God.

My hand tensed against his face and I breathed, “Joe.”

“Go home, Vi.”

“Joe –”

He kissed me quiet then muttered, “Get to your girls.”

I had no choice so I said, “Okay.”

He pulled out of me, rolled off and I rolled out of bed.

I yanked on my underwear, pulled on his tee from the night before (I was stealing that too, he wouldn’t miss it, he had a million of them), grabbed my dress, my shoes, went back to the bed, leaned in and kissed him.

“Come home safe,” I whispered.

“Later,” he replied.

Then I forced myself to walk calmly out of his room.

Mike had called every day since our date. He didn’t say much, he was either busy at work and couldn’t talk long or he had his kids with him.

But what he said was nice.

Wednesday late afternoon, he called to say he had to cancel because he had to work. He didn’t seem happy about it.

I didn’t know what to feel.

Relieved, a little. Disappointed, definitely. Confused, absolutely.

Joe didn’t call at all.

But the person who hung up did.

They called every day then hung up.

It was when they called and Keira answered then they hung up that I got worried because Keira told me that wasn’t the first time and because Kate told me she’d had several hang ups too.

So I called Colt and told him about the hang ups and he said he’d look into it.

Daniel Hart had never called and hung up. He didn’t seem the type. And, for that reason, this scared me. There was no logic in being scared. It could be some kid from Kate and Keira’s school. Maybe Keira had an admirer who didn’t have the courage to say hello. Or maybe it was some idiot kid who thought it was funny.

But I got a bad feeling about it.

So I didn’t need to be freaked out by what Daniel Hart would do next and hang up calls from psychos or maybe stupid kids.

And I didn’t need to be dating a nice, handsome guy who made me laugh and laughed with me and who was good kisser, like Mike, while being Joe’s booty call.

I was a mother. I needed to set an example. And I needed to get my shit together.

Therefore, Joe being gone and not around to get under my skin, I decided Joe had to go.

It was brilliant and I loved it, even fighting with him, I loved it, as crazy as that made me. He scared me but he also made me feel alive and I’d never met anyone like him and even with Tim, I’d never felt that alive.

Tim was about contentment and happiness. We had our ups and downs, we fought, but mostly life was even and good. I believed in him, our life, our family and he believed in all that too and he never gave me any reason to doubt that he did. The girls and me, we were his world and he let us know it.

It was steady, strong and beautiful. It wasn’t the wicked ride on a roller coaster that was Joe.

But those roller coasters were always the best ride in the park.

Even so, I knew it wasn’t right for me and it wasn’t right for my daughters.

So he had to go.

I lay in bed with my hand curled around my phone and decided I needed to make the call to end things with Joe.

I lifted the phone, slid it open and scrolled down to “Joe’s Cell”, took a deep breath that hitched in the middle, closed my eyes tight, opened them and hit go.

I put the phone to my ear.

It rang twice then Joe said, “Yo.”

“Hey.”

“Buddy.”

I closed my eyes tight again.

I really liked it when he called me “buddy”, maybe even better than when he called me “baby”.

“What’s up?” he asked.

“Um…” I could say no more. I wanted to… no, I didn’t want to, I needed to… but I couldn’t.

There was a hesitation then, softly, “Baby.”

Nope, I was wrong. I liked “baby” more.

“Somethin’ happen?” he asked, voice still soft.

“What?”

“He get to you?”

“Who?”

“Hart.”

Damn, he was worried about me.

“I don’t know,” I told him. “We’re getting hang ups.”

“Shit,” he muttered. “You tell Colt?”

“Yeah.”

“He didn’t tell me.”

“Oh.”

“I’ll call him,” Joe said then he asked, “What’d Colt say?”

“He said he’d look into it.”

“That all?”

“He didn’t go into specifics of what lookin’ into it would mean.”

“I’ll get specifics,” Joe stated firmly.

Yes, he was worried about me.

Okay, yeah, I liked him. Shit.

“The girls gettin’ the calls?” Joe asked.

“Yeah.”

“Shit,” he clipped, sounding pissed now. “They freaked?”

“I think they’re a bit worried, this is new, it’s never happened before.”

“Not Hart’s style.”

“That’s what makes it weird and scary.”

There was a pause then he said quietly, “You’ll be all right, buddy.”

“No alternative.”

He laughed shortly before saying, “Right.”

I didn’t reply.

Surprisingly, Joe did. “That why you called?”

No, it wasn’t.

“Yeah,” I lied because I chickened out. I’d do it later, in a note I’d put in his mailbox before Kate, Keira and I went on vacation (not that I had money for us to go on vacation but maybe I could sell a kidney or something). “You’re probably busy, I should let you go.”

“Vi, I’m drivin’ in LA. I don’t have a cell glued to my ear, they might arrest me.”

I didn’t think. If I did I would have quashed it. So, not thinking, the giggle slid right out of me.

Joe Callahan, rugged, tough guy, alpha male cracked a joke.

And it was a funny one.

When I stopped giggling, I told him, “I wouldn’t want you to get arrested.”

“Me either, been there, it sucks.”

This surprised me.

“You’ve been arrested?”

“Hard knock life, buddy, you saw my ex-wife crawlin’ drunk and whacked out of her mind on the floor.”

I blinked at the ceiling.

First he cracks a joke then he’s sharing. Before that, before he left to be away from me for two weeks, he made love to me, slow and sweet.

What did I do with this?

“I grew up, she didn’t,” he went on sharing.

“So you were arrested when you were a kid?”

“Juvie was my second home.”

“Wow.”

“Wasn’t home sweet home, buddy. Like I said, it sucked.”

“I’m sorry,” I said softly.

“I’m not, taught me a lesson, that’s life, you learn or you die.”

God, now he was being a sage and he was good at that too.

“Keira get her dog?” Joe asked.

“Next week,” I told him. “They aren’t totally weaned yet but we gave them the money and she picked the one she wanted. She’s over the moon, she can’t wait. She so can’t wait, we also have a dog food bowl, a dog water bowl, a dog bed in Keira’s room and four, enormous bags of puppy chow in the garage.”

“Sounds set.”

“That dog is so set, it isn’t funny. The thing is tiny. It’ll take him a year to get through that puppy chow. I just hope he doesn’t eat any of my shoes. Feb’s puppy eats all her shoes.”

I heard his soft laughter, something else I’d never heard from him and something else I liked, before he said, “Hang on a second, gotta give the keys to the valet.”

“Valet?”

“Yeah, at the hotel.”

“Oh.”

The thought of Joe at a hotel with a valet surprised me. He seemed more like a motel on a deserted highway type of guy, somewhere to crash where your car was outside your front door, ready for a quick getaway.

I waited, listening to what were sounds of Joe giving his keys to a valet then Joe said, “Back.”

I liked him being back, I also liked that he wanted to keep me on the line so when I said, “Hi,” I said it softly.

“Jesus,” he muttered.

“What?”

“We’ll get to what when I get to my room,” he told me mysteriously then continued. “Speakin’ of your garage, you need to start parkin’ your Mustang in there.”

“What?”

“Your ‘Stang, buddy, sweet ride. You should take care of it. You need to park it out of the elements.”

“I can’t.”

“Your garage is full, you should clear it.”

“No, I mean, the door won’t open, it’s jammed shut. Something wrong with the garage door opener.”

He said nothing for a second then he said, “I’ll look at it when I get home.”

I felt my breath leave me and I stared at the ceiling.

He bought my daughter a dog.

He made love to me.

I’d heard him laugh and crack a joke.

He was going to look at my garage door and he listened and advised when I talked about the girls.

And he wanted me on the line.

And, again, he bought my daughter a dog. And he did it because she lost her Dad.

“Violet?”

“What?” I whispered.

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” I lied but I wasn’t. I wanted to believe in him, I really did and he was giving me a lot to believe in.

“Where are you?”

“Home.”

“Yeah, baby, but where are you?”

“In my bedroom.”

“Where?”

“Where in my bedroom?”

“Yeah.”

“On my bed.”

“The door closed?”

“Um…” I looked at the door I’d closed to mute the explosions from the movie the kids were watching then I replied, somewhat confused, “Yeah.”

“You wearin’ jeans or one of your sweet skirts?”

Oh Lord, I wasn’t confused anymore.

“Joe –”

“Baby, answer me.”

“A skirt,” I whispered.

“Pull it up.”

“Joe –”

“Vi, pull it up.”

“Are you in your room?”

“Yeah.”

“Joe, I’ve never –”

His voice was sexy low when he said, “I’ll talk you through it, baby, now I want you to pull your skirt up for me.”

I bit my lip and tucked the phone in the crook of my shoulder then I shimmied my skirt up.

“Okay,” I whispered.

“It up?”

“Yes.”

“At your hips?”

“Yeah, Joe.”

“All right, buddy, slide your hand in your panties.”

Oh God, I was going to come and I hadn’t even touched myself.

“Violet?” he called.

I slid my hand in my panties.

“Joe,” I whispered when my finger hit my clit and the feel of it slid through me.

“Christ,” he muttered, his voice gruff.

“Are you –?”

“No, wanna listen to you.”

“You want me to do it alone?”

“I’m here, baby.”

I rolled my finger, my neck arched and a mew came out of my throat.

“That’s it,” he murmured. “Think of my mouth there.”

I kept rolling my finger, thinking of his mouth there and moaned, “Joe.”

“Jesus, buddy, you already sound close.”

I was. This was hot. I’d never done anything like this.

And anyway, thinking of his mouth there, hearing his voice on the phone, it worked.

“I like your voice,” I whispered then my hips bucked and I moaned again before I breathed, “I wish you were here.”

“Not as much as me, sounds so good, baby, this I’d like to see.”

I didn’t reply, just pressed and rolled my finger and ground my hips into it.

“Next time you’re in my bed, you do this for me,” he told me.

“I don’t think –”

He cut me off to order, “Slide your finger inside.”

“I like what I’m doin’.”

“Do what I say, Violet, slide your finger inside.”

I stopped rolling and slid my finger inside. It wasn’t the first time I’d done it but it had been a long time and it felt nice.

“How wet are you?” Joe asked.

“Very.”

“Christ, I miss that cunt of yours,” he growled.

“Joe,” I breathed, feeling myself spasm at his growl.

“Make yourself come, baby.”

“Okay,” I whispered.

He talked me through it and I came, not loud, quiet, but it felt good and he heard.

After, I slid my hand out of my panties, pulled my skirt down and rolled to my side, curling my legs up and feeling strangely that this was one of the most intimate things that had passed between us and he was most of a continent away.

“When’re you comin’ home?” I asked softly.

“Soon, doublin’ up on meetings, I should be home by Saturday.”

“Good,” I whispered.

“How’re you feelin’?”

I smiled into my pillow and answered quietly, “Nice.”

“Right now, I’d like to lick your fingers clean.” Another mew slid from my throat and when it did he growled again, this time unintelligibly.

“Mom!” I heard Keira screech, my body jerked on the bed and I sat upright.

“What the fuck?” Joe asked in my ear.

“Mom!” Keira screeched again, this time closer.

“Oh my God!” Kate yelled.

“Oh God, Joe,” I threw my legs off the bed and started running to the door.

“Call Colt,” Joe ordered urgently.

“Okay.”

“Now, buddy, right now.”

“Okay,” I slid my phone shut and threw open my door.

Keira was outside the door, her hand lifted toward the knob.

“Mom!” she shrieked in my face.

“What, baby, what?”

“The door… she’s at the door.”

She?

I looked into the living room to see both Kate and Dane at the window staring out.

Kate looked at me and breathed, “Oh my God.”

I couldn’t hear her, I just read her lips.

“Come away from the window,” I ordered as I rushed to it but they didn’t move so I got in front of Kate and looked out.

Then I breathed, “Oh my God.”

Kenzie Elise was standing at the door. She was wearing a drapey, ripped up, sleeveless t-shirt that looked like it cost more than my couch, skinny jeans and high-heeled platform, shiny taupe pumps. Her long mane of strawberry blonde hair was out to there and she had more makeup on than I wore on my date with Mike.

“Do you think she’s got the wrong house and is lookin’ for Mr. Callahan?” Dane suggested.

She didn’t have the wrong house but that didn’t mean she wasn’t looking for Joe.

I watched her lift her hand and press the buzzer and I guessed, by the irate way she did it, it wasn’t the first time. In a perfect world, I would be in the position to ask Joe to install a doorbell that was louder, say, one you could hear while you were having phone sex.

She turned and her eyes fell on us at the window and she didn’t look happy when she’d turned and she looked less happy when she spied us.

I jumped away from the window and went to the door.

“If she’s lookin’ for Joe, tell her he joined the Peace Corps,” Keira advised quickly, she’d surmised the situation and clearly wanted to run interference on Kenzie’s bid for Joe, making certain I had a clean go.

I gave my daughter a look, hit the necessary buttons on the alarm panel and then opened the door.

When I did, Kenzie looked down her nose at me. She actually tilted her eyes, not her head, to stare down her nose at me from her towering height in her platform heels.

“Hey there,” I said, like she or any other famous movie star came to my door every day and like the last time I saw her she wasn’t practically naked and crawling around on the floor.

“Is Cal here?” she asked.

Damn. I knew she was looking for Joe.

“No, he’s in LA,” I told her.

“How do you know where Joe is?” Keira asked and I looked behind me to see Keira, Kate and Dane had all gathered close to my back. Keira was staring at me; Kate and Dane were staring at Kenzie.

“He told me,” I said to Keira.

“When?” Keira asked.

I would have paid money at that moment to have a less astute daughter.

“She calls him Joe?” Kenzie interrupted us with her question and I looked back at her because she sounded kind of pissed and when I looked at her she was glaring at Keira.

“Yeah, we all call him Joe,” Keira shared. “Or, at least, Mom, Kate and me do. Dane calls him Mr. Callahan.”

Kenzie’s eyes came to me and I was right, she was pissed.

“He doesn’t let anyone call him Joe.”

I opened my mouth to speak but Keira got there before I could.

“He lets us call him Joe, he likes it.”

I wracked my brain for a way to intervene and stupidly offered, “Would you like to come in, have a pop or a beer?”

She stared daggers at me and announced, “We need to talk.”

I didn’t know what she wanted to talk about, though I did know, whatever it was, I didn’t want to talk about it but I couldn’t exactly shut the door in her face in front of the kids because they didn’t know anything about anything and I didn’t want them to.

Therefore, I invited, “Okay, come in,” then I stepped out of the way.

Her eyes swept Kate, Dane and Keira then they came back to me.

“Alone.”

I looked into my house. There wasn’t much alone space in my house unless I took her to a bedroom which I wasn’t going to do.

Then I saw the sliding glass door to the deck. It was a nice night, not muggy, fresh and warm. The deck was perfect.

“We’ll go sit on the deck,” I told her and swung my arm out, showing the way. She sashayed in, all leg (or, more aptly, bony leg) and swaying hips and she walked through my house as if prolonged exposure to the air the girls and I breathed would contaminate her.

I walked behind her and ordered the kids, “Go back to your movie.”

“Mom –” Keira started.

“Come on, Keirry, let’s finish the movie,” Kate urged, her eyes on me, she grabbed her sister and started pulling her to the couch.

I threw my eldest a smile, saying a silent prayer to God in thanks he gave me one sane daughter and hustled behind Kenzie.

She pulled the door open herself and walked out, her pumps sounding on the wood of my deck as she headed straight to the wrought iron furniture Tim had bought me at an end of season sale three years ago. The furniture was fantastic, a circular table, wide, comfy chairs that rocked and a big umbrella. There were also two loungers. All of these had elegant, tailored gray pads on them.

She dumped her big, slouchy, designer handbag on the table without looking at me or my garden and started digging through it.

I closed the sliding glass door and approached her, stopping out of distance of her nails.

She pulled out a gold case, selected a cigarette, dropped the case back in her purse and put the cigarette to her lips, lighting it with an elegant, slim, gold lighter.

Then she let out of a plume of smoke and stared out at my lawn.

Without anything to say to her, I looked around my deck.

If I wasn’t at the garden center, at the grocery store, doing laundry, ironing, cooking, cleaning house, buying expensive dog food and water bowls, sleeping with Joe or just plain sleeping, I was in my yard.

My boss Bobbie gave great employee discounts and I took advantage as much as I could on our tight budget. I’d used some of the money my brother gave me to augment this but most of that I tucked away for a rainy day. But, even if I said so myself, I didn’t do half bad with my yard.

The front of the house had window boxes on all of the windows stuffed full of flowers bursting out and greenery trailing down. I had sections of split rail fence at one side of my drive and another where the drive met the front walk that ran from the drive parallel to the house. I’d planted lush, tall grasses around the fences with low to the ground flowers that had filled in beautifully in the Indiana soil. I had a burgeoning hanging basket by the front door and the front walk was lined with vibrant, healthy bedding plants. It looked great.

The back was better. The lawn was just lawn but I’d fertilized it and put weed killer on it and it looked brilliant, rich green, thick and lush. But it was the deck that was the show stopper with its posh furniture. I’d bought bunches of terracotta pots in every size and they were everywhere, stuffed full of flowers of all colors and varieties. It appeared random but I spent ages fiddling with them until I liked what I saw.

And it looked beautiful. I had a way with flowers, always did. I had a part-time job in a florist shop before Tim died because I loved flowers. And Bobbie let me do the displays at the garden center and everyone was talking about them. I even had a customer come up to me the week before and offer to pay me to have a look at her garden, said she was hopeless and needed garden direction. I was going to her house on my day off next week.

“You fucking Cal?”

I started and my eyes jerked to Kenzie when she spoke.

I didn’t know what to say. Her question was nosy and rude and more than a little psycho, considering Joe had made it perfectly clear in a way that couldn’t possibly be ignored that this kind of information was none of her business.

And why was she there, considering Joe had made it perfectly clear in a way that couldn’t possibly be ignored that her infiltration into his life was not welcome?

And anyway, I had kids in the house. Was she nuts?

I looked back at the house and through the sliding glass doors. The kids didn’t have their faces pressed to the glass which was good and I hoped they couldn’t hear.

“You’re fucking him,” Kenzie went on and I looked at her again.

“Would you mind telling me why you’re here?” I asked.

She had one arm crossed at her ribs, her other elbow resting on her wrist and her cigarette hand in the air. She swung her hand to her face, took a drag then swung her hand out as she exhaled the smoke.

Then she looked me top to toe.

“What’s his deal?” she asked though I didn’t think she was asking me even if I was the only one there and I found I was right when she went on. “You’re fat.”

I felt my body go solid.

I was not fat. Okay, so, I wasn’t thin nor was I rail thin and emaciated like her but I couldn’t be described as fat.

“I’m not fat,” I stated.

She sneered and took another drag off her cigarette.

I’d had enough. In fact, I should have slammed the door in her face.

“Listen, if I can’t help you with something, maybe you’d like to –”

“Vi?”

I twisted around and saw Colt standing at the end of my deck looking at us.

“Hey Colt,” I called.

His eyes moved to Kenzie, I saw his face register recognition but that was it then his eyes came straight back to me.

“You okay?” he asked, walking down the deck toward the steps and I saw he had his badge on the belt of his jeans.

“I’m fine,” I told him as he jogged up the steps. “I just –”

“Hi there,” Kenzie breathed and I swung my head around to look at her to see she was gazing at Colt like he was a hot fudge sundae with tons of whipped cream, nuts and a cherry.

“Hey,” he replied, barely glancing at her and his eyes came to me. “Cal called, said the girls were screamin’?”

Joe had called Colt for me. My stomach did a little flip.

“Um… they were a little excited about a movie star bein’ at the door.”

Colt’s eyes sliced through Kenzie again then they came back to me.

“You better call Cal. He’s worried it was somethin’ to do with your thing,” Colt told me.

He was worried about me. My stomach did another little flip.

“I’m Kenzie Elise,” Kenzie butted in and I looked at her again.

“I know who you are, found out about ten minutes ago you keep callin’ Vi’s house,” Colt said to her, my mouth dropped open at this news and I stared at Kenzie realizing she was nuts. “Gonna have to ask you to stop doin’ that,” Colt went on.

“You have my number?” I asked but she ignored me, her eyes glued to Colt.

“I’m looking for Cal,” Kenzie told Colt.

“How did you get my number?” I asked but she didn’t answer because Colt spoke.

“You want to talk to him, you call his girl. You don’t call Vi’s house and hang up.”

His girl? What girl? Joe had a girl?

I forgot about finding out how Kenzie got my number, the more pressing matter at hand was Joe having a “girl”.

“Lindy won’t give him my messages,” Kenzie said to Colt.

“I’ll let Cal know his secretary is fallin’ down on the job.”

Joe had a secretary?

Joe stayed in hotels with valet parking and had a secretary?

“Now unless you have some business with Violet, might be a good idea you move along,” Colt ordered but did it in a way that sounded like a suggestion except it was a suggestion you couldn’t exactly deny. Kenzie denied it. “It’s important I speak to him.”

Colt stared at her for several long seconds like he didn’t know what to make of her but what he was coming up with wasn’t much. Then he reached into his back jeans pocket, pulled out his phone, flipped it open and hit some buttons.

Then he put it to his ear, his eyes on the deck while it rang then he said, “Yeah, Cal, Colt. Everything’s cool except Kenzie Elise is standing on Vi’s deck. She wants to talk to you.” A second passed and then Colt grinned at the deck and said, “Yeah, I’ll put her on,” then he offered Kenzie his phone.

Kenzie didn’t look at either of us before she took the phone and put it to her ear.

“You let her call you Joe?” she snapped into it without saying hello which, personally, I thought was a mistake.

I watched as she paused, listened, her face grew even paler than her normal pale (there it was, proof her snapping at Joe was a mistake) then it twisted before she said, “I have another situation and only you can help me out,” again she paused then, “I don’t want him, I want you.”

I thought this also was a mistake. Joe didn’t like it much that Kenzie thought she could get what she wanted when she wanted it.

I watched as she was silent for another moment then she said, “No,” another pause then a hissed, “I can’t believe you won’t help me!” Yet another pause while her eyes came to me and she snapped, “I don’t think so!” She listened for about two seconds then she took the phone from her ear, jerked it toward me and bit out, “He wants to talk to you.”

I took Colt’s phone, glancing at her then at Colt then I put it to my ear and announced, “She called me fat.”

“Buddy –”

“I have my own stalker, Joe. I don’t want to have to deal with yours.”

He burst out laughing and I didn’t think anything was funny.

“I have your movie star stalker standin’ on my deck, calling me fat and she’s callin’ my house and hangin’ up. This is not funny.”

Joe’s laughter vanished, he was silent then he said in a soft but scary voice, “What?”

“Your movie star stalker is the one doing the hang ups.”

There was no silence before Joe demanded, “Put Colt on the phone.”

“What?”

“Give the fuckin’ phone to Colt,” he clipped.

I decided to give the phone to Colt seeing as Joe sounded pretty freaking pissed so I sure didn’t want to talk to him anymore.

Colt put it to his ear and said, “Yeah?” then he listened for awhile and said, “Gotcha. Later.” He flipped his phone shut, shoved it in his jeans and looked at Kenzie. “Cal says you aren’t off Vi’s property in five minutes, he calls some guy named Marco. He says you’d know what that means.”

I looked at Kenzie and I could tell straight off she knew what that meant. Her face had bleached completely of color, her eyes had gone wide, her lips had parted and she looked scared.

Then quickly she flicked her cigarette butt in my yard, snatched up her purse and stomped to the stairs.

“Ms. Elise,” Colt called and she turned, foot on the step, hand on the rail and looked at him. “Do I have your assurance that you won’t be callin’ Vi anymore and there won’t be any more visits?”

“Yeah, whatever,” she mumbled and kept going.

“Ms. Elise,” Colt called again, turning fully toward her and Kenzie, now standing in my grass, stopped and looked up at him. “Not whatever. No more calls, no more visits. Yeah?”

“Yeah, right. Fine,” she said and looked at me. “Fine, tell him I won’t bother him anymore or you. Okay?”

When it appeared she actually wanted an answer from me, I said, “Okay.”

“Just make sure he doesn’t call Marco,” she said to me, this seemed important to her so I nodded.

She started away but turned back and looked at me and when she did, she’d changed. Everything about her changed. She didn’t look scared anymore, she looked lost and afraid, a different kind of afraid, a worse kind.

“He made me feel safe,” she said quietly, I blinked at her honest, open admission and she kept talking. “I don’t feel safe very much, ever, really. Cal made me feel safe.”

When she seemed again to be waiting for an answer, I answered, “He has that way about him.”

“He belonged to me, I’d always feel safe.”

At that moment, I realized I knew exactly what she meant.

I walked to the railing, looked down at her and said, “I’m not sure Joe’s the kind of guy who could belong to anyone, Kenzie.”

She stared at me a second and the way she did it I actually felt sorry for her.

“You call him Joe, he belongs to you,” she whispered and before I could say anything or have a reaction to her words other than that feeling of being punched in the stomach, she turned and gracefully ran on the toes of her fancy, shiny, platform pumps across my lawn and around the house.

I watched the space where she used to be for a few seconds before I felt Colt’s arm come around my shoulders and I turned my head to look up at him.

“That was kinda sad,” I told him.

He looked to the side of the house then down at me. “Woman who has everything but really has nothin’.”

I sighed then I nodded. Colt dropped his arm, jogged down the steps and walked out into my yard to pick up the cigarette butt.

He looked at me. “Shame this mars your yard, babe. You do good flowers.”

I smiled at him. “Thanks.”

“I’ll toss this out,” he said, lifting the butt. “You good now?”

“I’m good, Colt, thanks for comin’ over.”

“Anytime, Vi,” he said and turned to leave. “Later.”

“Bye, Colt, tell Feb I said hi and tickle Jack for me.”

“Will do,” he called as he turned the corner of the house.

I stared after him for awhile too. Then I went into the house and all the kids watched me walk to the kitchen.

“She gone?” Kate asked.

“Yep,” I answered, pulling a bottle of cheap white wine out of the fridge feeling this was the time that cheap white wine was created for.

“What’d she want?” Keira asked.

“Joe,” I answered.

“And?” Keira prompted.

I found the corkscrew and looked at Keira through the bar opening. “Joe doesn’t want her.”

“Killer!” Keira hissed, pumping her fisted hand in the kind of gesture you’d use on a trucker to get him to honk his horn.

I looked at Kate. “You think it’s something in the water or is she just touched?”

“She’s just touched,” Kate said, Dane laughed and they hit the play button to restart the movie.

I poured myself a glass of wine and went back out to my deck with my phone in my hand.

I barely had my ass to the seat when it rang, I looked at the display and it was Joe.

I slid it open and put it to my ear. “Hi.”

“She gone?”

“Yeah, drama over.” He didn’t reply so I asked, “Who’s Marco?”

“Her manager,” Joe answered.

“She seems pretty scared of him,” I remarked.

“Reason to be.”

“What reason?”

“She’s where she is ‘cause of him. Her problem is, she made a deal with the devil.”

“A deal with the devil?”

“Marco’s bad news,” Joe told me.

“Bad news how?” I asked.

“Bad news, she steps outta line, he yanks her back and he isn’t nice about it.”

That didn’t sound good, that sounded face pale, lips parted, eyes wide not good.

“What?” I whispered.

“He can get physical, buddy.”

“Physical, as in, he beats her?”

“Yeah,” Joe answered. “She’s his cash cow. He skims off the top of everything she does, lives a good life. She does shit that might rock that boat, he doesn’t like it and makes that known however he has to.”

“That’s awful.”

“Yeah, but it isn’t your problem and it isn’t mine. It’s the deal she made.”

A thought occurred to me so I asked, “Why didn’t you call Marco before when you were having problems with her?”

“It was just me, I could deal with it and I didn’t want to be responsible for him gettin’ in her face. Fuckin’ with you and the girls, she wasn’t makin’ it about me, she was draggin’ you into it. I thought I could make my point, fuck, I thought I did. But I didn’t. She fucks with you and the girls, she needs to know I’m serious. Now she knows.”

I took a sip of my wine thinking that my world, not too long ago, even when Tim would come home and talk about some of the shit he’d seen, was a little bubble of goodness. Now the stuff that kept pricking it without Tim to keep that bubble strong and resilient was scary crazy.

“Buddy?”

“Yeah?”

“You all right? She say anything else to you?”

Yes, she did. She told me Joe belonged to me.

But I wasn’t going to tell him that.

“No, just flicked her cigarette butt in my yard and left.”

“Fuck, what a bitch,” he muttered.

“That’s okay, Colt got it.”

He sighed then said, “Good man.”

“Joe?”

“Yeah, buddy?”

“Would you have called Marco?”

He didn’t hesitate before he answered, “Yeah.”

This shocked me and it also disappointed me. “Really?”

“Really.”

“But –”

“Baby, she was callin’ you and the girls were pickin’ up, gettin’ freaked out. It had to be stopped, that was my last option. She forced my hand.”

“Joe –”

“She forced my hand, Vi. She did it to herself with this crazy shit. You back a man in a corner, you gotta bear the consequences when he does what he has to do to fight his way out.”

He was being a sage again.

And it hit me then that she didn’t back Joe into a corner. She tossed the girls and me there. Joe hadn’t threatened that Marco business when she was doing her thing to catch his attention. He thought he could deal with it and he didn’t want to scare her like he just did. But he pulled out the big guns for me and the girls.

I didn’t want to make this into a big thing, I didn’t want to make the same mistake and start to believe but he was giving me no choice.

I took another sip of my wine then changed the subject because this kind of subject you didn’t talk about over the phone.

“Well, thanks for dealing with it all the way from LA.”

“Don’t thank me, I’m the reason she was there.”

“She was here because she has the hots for you. It isn’t your fault you’re hot.”

I heard his soft laughter again, I decided I liked it again then he said, “Baby, you’re killin’ me.”

“How am I killin’ you?”

“You can be sweet and hilarious when I’m close enough to give payback.”

My stomach dipped and I pulled in breath to control my fluttering heart.

“What’s payback?” I whispered.

“Be sweet and hilarious in my bed, I’ll show you.”

“Joe –”

He cut me off. “What’re you doin’ now?”

“Drinking cheap white wine on my deck. What are you doing?”

“I gotta go get food.”

“Oh, okay, I’ll let you go.”

“All right, buddy.”

“You’re back on Saturday?”

“Yeah.”

“See you then.”

“Absolutely.”

I sighed and it was a happy sigh because I would see him, he wanted me to and Saturday was only one-ish day away.

“Bye, Joe,” I said softly.

“Later, buddy,” he replied back softly.

I slid my phone closed and then tapped my forehead with it.

I had, of course, called him to end things but instead we talked, we had phone sex and he gave me about a dozen reasons to believe in him. Then, through various other phone calls, he gave me more reasons to believe.

I put the phone on the table and took another sip of wine.

I needed to call Cheryl or I needed to talk to Feb or I needed to call one of my friends in Chicago.

But it was late and it was rude to call late, especially when the conversation I needed to have would likely take hours.

So I put my feet up in the chair, looked at my gorgeous grass and my pretty flower pots and, as I sipped my wine, I decided to see what Saturday might bring.