Colters' Gift

CHAPTER 3

LAUREN finished tidying the tiny living room of her efficiency apartment and stared around in satisfaction. It was small, but it was filled with furniture and knickknacks, and was decorated to look homey and cozy.

Max had been so helpful in her getting back on her feet, but she owed the most to Holly, Lily and Callie. The three women had dragged her shopping and they’d spent a tireless amount of time making sure Lauren’s apartment was one she was comfortable and happy in.

It was her day off from the diner, and while she had standing invitations to drop in on her brother and sister-in-law or any of the Colters, today she just wanted a quiet day in her apartment reading.

Later she’d take a walk down Main Street and do some windowshopping. It amused her that window-shopping in Clyde consisted of looking into the one women’s boutique that sold everything from lingerie to accessories and everything in between.

There was a small, used bookstore at the end, and she always looked forward to scanning the new stock to see what struck her fancy. Callie had been after her to buy an e-reader so she could just download books from the online retailers without ever leaving her house, but there was something about the trip to the bookstore and returning home with a bag of books she couldn’t wait to dig into.

And there was the simple fact that she couldn’t afford the e-reader right now. It had taken every penny to move in and buy what was needed for the apartment. If she splurged and bought the reading device, she’d be uncontrollable with buying e-books.

For now, she’d have to stick with gently used and savor every book. Besides, she couldn’t trade in a digital book when she was finished.

She perused her bookshelf and finally selected the newest Jaci Burton book she’d purchased. Just as she settled down to indulge, there was a knock at her door

Frowning, she pushed herself up from the couch and went to the front door. It was probably one of the Colter women. It could even be Max, but he was usually better about calling to let her know he was stopping by, whereas the Colter women—especially Holly—just dropped by whenever they got the urge.

But when she opened the door and saw who was standing there, her jaw went completely slack as she gaped at Noah Sullivan and Liam Prescott.

They didn’t belong here. They represented a part of her past she wanted to forget. They were a world away, in a city she’d fled.

“Lauren,” Noah acknowledged with a tight nod. “You’re looking good.”

“You look great,” Liam amended softly.

She still couldn’t find her tongue. What were they doing here?

“Can we come in?” Noah asked. “We need to talk to you.”

“A-about w-what?”

She clutched the door tighter and pulled it so it narrowed the gap.

Liam frowned. “Lauren, we aren’t going to hurt you. We just need to talk to you. It’s important.”

Her pulse was racing fast enough to make her light-headed. She knew Noah and Liam posed no danger to her. Or at least she thought she knew. It wasn’t them she feared as much as why they were here.

“Open the door, Lauren,” Noah said in a quiet tone.

Realizing how much attention they were likely attracting, she finally opened the door and let them walk into the living room.

If it had seemed small to her before, now it was tiny with the two big men filling it.

She had a love seat and an armchair, and she quickly took the armchair so the two men would be left with the love seat.

Perched on the edge, she waited while they made themselves comfortable. Or at least as much as they could, trying to fit their large frames on her small piece of furniture.

She balled up her fingers together and stuck her hands between her knees to prevent them from shaking. Their presence unnerved her for too many reasons to list.

And yet she drank in the sight of them, unable to tear her gaze from the two men who’d once been hired to protect her.

They were the complete antithesis of Joel, and maybe that was why she’d allowed herself to relax around them and trust them. In the beginning she’d thrown up every barrier she could, anything to prevent them from getting close.

But they’d broken every wall she’d placed between them. They’d bullied her mercilessly, making sure she ate, that she took care of herself. They couldn’t possibly know just how much she’d softened toward them, because she’d been too intent on shutting them out and treating them indifferently.

When Max had arrived at her apartment, determined to take her home with him and Callie, part of her was hugely relieved while the other part of her was reluctant to let go of the two men she’d come to rely on.

Having them near her just made her feel safe in a world where she was anything but. If they knew what she’d done and all she’d kept from them, they’d be pissed as hell.

She’d made some horrifically stupid choices. She could admit that now. But at the time, she’d been a scared-out-of-her-mind woman who desperately wanted a way out of her situation. She hadn’t been thinking straight. But who could blame her?

She blamed herself enough without anyone else knowing the extent of her stupidity.

“Lauren?”

She looked up quickly at the sound of Liam’s voice. She realized that one or both men had been talking to her, and she had no idea what they’d been saying.

“I’m sorry,” she blurted. “You should have called. You caught me completely off guard.”

Noah’s eyes narrowed. “And would you have been here if we’d called? Or would you have been conveniently somewhere else?”

Heat scorched her cheeks. He couldn’t possibly know that’s what she would have done. And yet he’d called her out on it as if he’d reached right into her head and plucked out her thoughts. Was she so easily read?

Liam cleared his throat. “We’re here to discuss Joel Knight.”

The blood rushed from her face. Her stomach knotted into a tight ball. She swayed precariously in her seat before making a grab for the arms with each hand so she didn’t humiliate herself.

“I want you to leave,” she blurted out.

Liam leaned forward, those vivid blue eyes pinning her in place. His hair hung to his shoulders, in varying lengths, as if he didn’t worry too much over how it was cut. It had a slight curl, making it look unruly. The ends flipped up this way and that. She could remember her fingers itching to reach out and smooth it.

It suddenly occurred to her why she’d eventually grown to trust these two men. Why she’d relaxed her guard toward the end of their business relationship.

They were nothing like Joel, and while she’d always recognized this, it really hit home with her now.

Joel was polished. Never a hair out of place. Expensive clothing. Only the best suits. A tie. Perfectly shined shoes. Fake tan. He never walked out of his home unless he looked his best. He’d never be caught dead with men like Liam and Noah.

Liam and Noah were . . . Well, they didn’t give a shit. With them it was either take it or leave it, and your loss if you left it.

They both had dark hair, though Liam’s was more of a true, midnight black and Noah’s was such a dark brown that it was nearly black. Alone one might think his hair was black, but standing next to Liam, it was obvious that Noah’s hair was lighter.

Liam’s eyes were a shock of blue. Startling and vibrant. He was a man that drew stares from women and men alike. Noah’s eyes were dark, like Lauren’s own, only he had flecks of green and gold mixed in with the brown. In the right light, the different colors shone, lightening his eyes and making them mesmerizing to look at.

Both sported tattoos. Noah had what looked to be a Japanese symbol on his right arm and then a bracelet tattoo on his right wrist. Liam had intricately, colorfully rendered sleeves on both arms. Lauren had often stared when he wasn’t looking, studying the designs. There was so much detail that she couldn’t imagine how long it had taken the artist to complete the tattoos or how patient Liam had to have been through the process.

Separately, the men were forces to be reckoned with. But together? Complete badasses. No one in their right mind would cross them.

Except, she had. Crossed them. Or at least lied to them. And now they knew she’d lied.

Liam was still staring holes through her. She wanted to crawl underneath her chair and stay there until they were gone. Until she forgot why they’d come. She just wanted to put it all behind her. Them, Joel, everything.

“We’re not going anywhere,” Liam said grimly. “You’ve got a hell of a lot of explaining to do.”

She didn’t want to be the weak, pathetic woman she’d been such a short time ago. But them being here made her want to run for cover. She wanted to barricade herself in her bedroom and shut the world out.

But isn’t that what she’d done for so very long? She’d existed in a haze of denial, too stupid, too cowardly to face the truth, and to act.

“Damn it, Lauren, we’re not going to hurt you,” Noah said. “Stop looking at us like we’re that bastard who abused you.”

She swallowed and then lowered her head to put her hands over her face.

It was automatic to flinch away when she felt the hand on her shoulder. She heard a soft curse, but the hand was quickly removed.

“Lauren, look at me.”

It was Liam, his voice as soft and warm as the first rays of spring sunshine. She was compelled to do as he said, even before she realized she had raised her head.

He took a deep breath, letting it blow out long and slow. It was a sigh that expressed a lot. Exasperation. Pity. She hated the pity. People who were truly victims deserved pity and kindness. She was someone who’d allowed bad things to happen to her because she was too much of a coward—and an idiot—to get herself out of it. And on top of it all, she’d lied to her brother, the one person who loved her in this world. She’d lied to the Colters, not overtly. She’d never voiced the lie, but it had been one of omission, which made it just as bad.

And she’d lied to the two men who’d vowed to protect her. She hadn’t given them the information they’d needed in order to do their job, because she’d been afraid of what might happen to them.

None of the reasons made sense now. She was honest enough with herself to admit that. She hadn’t known what she was doing or saying all those months ago. She’d just reacted.

Now those lies were coming back to haunt her. Just when she’d finally made peace with the choices she’d made.

“We know about Joel Knight,” Liam said quietly. “The question is why didn’t you tell us about him? Why weren’t you honest about who hurt you? Were you protecting him?”

There was a note of fury that accompanied his last question, one she was forced to respond to.

“No!” she said fiercely. “I wasn’t protecting him. I hate him.”

“Then why?” Noah demanded. “Why send us on a wild-goose chase trying to find a man who didn’t exist? Do you have any idea how much time we’ve wasted looking for the son of a bitch who beat you up? We had the local police involved. We pulled so many goddamn strings trying to find this man so he could be arrested, so he’d never hurt another woman. And the entire time, we were looking for a ghost.”

She closed her eyes. “I can understand why you’re angry. I’m sorry I wasted your time.”

Her eyes popped open again when Liam let out an expletive that singed her ears.

“You have no idea why we’re angry,” Liam snapped.

Her hands were shaking again. Hell, her knees were too. Suddenly both men were close. Way too close. They’d vacated the love seat and were on either side of her armchair. Big and hulking. She should be terrified, but she’d never been afraid of them. They’d always made her feel safe, from the moment they’d accompanied Max to the apartment he’d moved her to.

“Ask us why we’re angry, Lauren,” Liam continued. “If you want the truth, then ask us.”

“W-why are you angry?” she stammered out.

“Because we care about what happens to you,” Noah said. “And while we were off looking for the wrong guy, Joel Knight could have gotten to you. He could have hurt you and we would have never seen it coming. We’re pissed because we were put in a position where we couldn’t do our job. And our job is to make sure nothing happens to you.”

Liam shook his head impatiently. “You aren’t just a damn job to us, Lauren. Use your head. You have to see that we’re attracted to you. That it makes us fucking insane knowing what this asshole did to you and when we think of what could have happened because you didn’t tell us the truth, it makes me crazy. What if he’d come after you? Did you ever think about that?”

She glanced rapidly between the two men, her mind in such turmoil that she couldn’t even comprehend the meaning of what Liam had just blasted her with.

It was crazy. All of it. But even crazier? She’d thought that she was alone in her fascination with these two men. She’d been bewildered by the fact that she could even look at Noah and Liam and entertain the thoughts she’d had.

He was wrong. She hadn’t seen it. She hadn’t even entertained the notion that they were attracted to her. All she’d seen in their eyes was pity and rage, two things she would have thought they would feel for any woman in her situation. They were honorable men. Their job was to protect people. Whoever hired them. Why on earth would they feel anything more for her than anyone else they were assigned to protect?

She shook her head, denying it even as they sat in front of her, bluntly laying it out. She’d allowed a man to walk all over her. She’d allowed Joel to manipulate her, dictate to her. How could anyone look at that woman she’d been and feel anything more than disgust?

She was an intelligent woman with a college degree. She had common sense, had always prided herself on being able to stand on her own two feet. And it had only taken Joel a few weeks before he’d completely taken over her life.

What shamed her most was that she’d so easily fallen into the life that Joel had built for her. Before, she would have laughed at anyone who would have told her she would fall into a relationship with someone who controlled her every movement down to what she wore and what she ate.

Everyone around her had been able to see the truth of her relationship with Joel, but she’d been so rooted in denial that she convinced herself they were wrong. She didn’t think she’d ever be able to forget the humiliation of having that veil lifted away and finally being able to see herself for what she was.

Gullible. Naïve. Stupid.

It pricked her pride. It gutted her and made her feel the kind of worthlessness she never wished on anyone else.

“What the hell are you thinking?” Noah asked in exasperation. “What kind of hell are you putting yourself through right now? I can see the shame in your eyes. It’s in your body language and written clearly on your face.”

“You can’t possibly understand what I’m thinking or feeling,” she said.

“Then make us understand,” Liam challenged. “What could possibly motivate you to lie about the man who did this to you? If you weren’t protecting him, then who the hell were you protecting?”

She surged to her feet, her fingers fisted into tight balls. She honest to God wanted to hit someone, something. Anything to vent the rage building inside her. But that made her no better than the monster who’d done the same to her.

“I wasn’t afraid for me!” she yelled. “I was afraid for Max. I was afraid for you!”