Colters' Gift

CHAPTER 1

THIS is killing me,” Noah said in a grim voice.

Liam sighed and rubbed a weary hand through his hair as he stared back at his friend. “It’s killing me too,” he admitted. “She’s not sleeping, and when she does, she has nightmares. I don’t know what to do. I feel so fucking helpless!”

Noah sipped at the steaming mug of coffee and stared out the glass patio doors leading onto the small deck of the cabin he, Liam and Lauren now shared. When they’d returned to Clyde six weeks ago, they’d known they had to address the issue of housing. There was no way they could continue to stay in Lauren’s tiny efficiency apartment above the clinic in town.

Adam had called in a favor from an old friend who had a cabin just out of town. It was halfway between Clyde and where the older Colters lived up the mountain. The man hadn’t lived in it for some time and only used it as a vacation home once or twice a year. He’d been happy for them to move into it. It wasn’t perfect, but it would do until they could figure out what they wanted as far as a permanent place to live.

There was no question that they’d remain here. Surrounded by Lauren’s family. People who loved her and were a constant source of comfort and solace. But they had a lot to work out. Mainly what the hell he and Liam were going to do in order to support the woman they both loved.

They had money saved. They could definitely make that money last for a long period of time, but it wasn’t infinite. And the last thing Noah wanted was for Lauren to ever want for anything. He’d give her the fucking moon if that’s what she wanted.

“We just have to give her time,” Noah said quietly. “She went through hell. I can still see the fucking shame in her eyes at times, and it pisses me off that we let that son of a bitch get to her. That she spent enough time with him that he abused her. Again.”

Liam nodded, but his eyes were stormy at the reminder of what Joel Knight had done to Lauren.

They hadn’t made love to Lauren since returning home six weeks ago. They hadn’t even made an attempt. With her sleep wracked by nightmares, and the shadows in her eyes present during the waking hours, they hadn’t wanted to push. They’d wait forever if that’s what it took. They weren’t going anywhere. Lauren was it for them.

“He died too quickly,” Liam said savagely.

Noah nodded in agreement.

Both men looked up and went quiet when Lauren walked into the living room. She was wearing a pair of faded flannel pajama bottoms and one of Noah’s T-shirts. He softened as he took in the fatigue in her eyes. He liked seeing his shirt on her. Like he was wrapped around her every minute.

“Morning,” she said in a low voice.

She even managed a smile, but Noah knew she had to be exhausted. She’d woken him and Liam up just after midnight with soft whimpering. She had been greatly distressed, and when they’d finally managed to wake her, she’d been shaky and distraught.

In a voice that still made Noah’s gut tighten, she’d lashed out, asking why? Why was she still plagued by Joel Knight? Why couldn’t she just forget and move on? He was dead. Could never hurt her again. She resented the hold he had on her even from the grave.

Liam rose and strode toward where Lauren stood. He pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly. Then he leaned down to brush a kiss across her mouth.

“Good morning, baby. How are you today?”

At least he hadn’t asked her a really dumbass question like, How did you sleep?

“Better,” she whispered.

She must have seen the doubt in Noah’s face, because she smiled and then pulled away from Liam to cross over to where Noah sat. He reached for her, pulling her down into his lap, his arms wrapped securely around her.

“I really am,” she said.

He kissed her temple and squeezed. “Glad to hear it.”

“Aren’t Dillon and Seth coming this morning?” she asked.

Noah nodded. The two men had called the night before and asked to come out this morning.

“Is anything wrong?” she asked, her expression troubled.

Noah squeezed her again. “Not at all. They said they had something they wanted to discuss with me and Liam. Didn’t expound. But I’m sure it’s nothing.”

She didn’t look convinced. “It just seems odd that they’d both come all the way out here with Lily being so close to her delivery. With her on bed rest until she goes into labor, her husbands haven’t so much as left her side.”

Noah hadn’t considered that, and now that Lauren brought it up, he too wondered what the two men wanted. Lily had been placed on bed rest three weeks earlier when she’d begun having contractions. Her husbands had wanted to move her to Denver immediately so she’d be close to a large hospital, but she’d been adamant that she wanted to be here. Surrounded by her family. Her husbands hadn’t liked it, but they couldn’t refuse her anything. And Noah was sure they wanted their family with them when the first Colter grandchild was born as well.

A knock sounded at the door, and Lauren yanked her head up and then looked down at her pajamas and grimaced.

“I’m going to go jump in the shower while you talk to Seth and Dillon.”

Noah kissed her again as Liam headed for the door. “Don’t worry, okay? I’m sure nothing is wrong or they would have come out and said so rather than make a deal out of coming out to talk to us.”

She nodded and smiled, her eyes brightening. She leaned down after she rose from his lap, and kissed him long and sweet.

“I love you,” she whispered against his mouth.

“Love you too, sweetheart.”

She hurried toward the bedroom and closed the door just as Liam returned to the living room, Seth and Dillon right behind him.

Noah rose to shake the two men’s hands before motioning for them to sit on the couch in the small living room.

“Is something wrong?” Noah asked cautiously.

Seth looked startled but shook his head. “Not at all. Dillon and I had matters to discuss with you and Liam. About your future here. And Lauren.”

He said her name last, more pointedly, and despite the fact they said nothing was wrong, Liam tensed at the mention of her name.

Dillon and Seth exchanged looks and then focused their gazes on Noah and Liam.

“Look, we know this is difficult. For all of you,” Dillon said grimly. “We also know you’re doing the right thing for Lauren, and we appreciate that. Our entire family does. Especially Max. We’ve all been worried about Lauren, and the thing is, she’s worried too. About you two.”

Noah and Liam exchanged quick what the fuck? looks. Lauren was worried about them? Oh hell no. She had enough on her plate without them adding to her worries.

“What the hell do you mean by that?” Liam demanded.

“There’s no roundabout way to discuss this,” Seth said. “So I’m just going to put it out there. I need a deputy. Jim is retiring soon. He already would have if I’d had a ready replacement. A few years ago when I took over the sheriff’s position from Lacy England, she said that Jim wanted to work a few more years to secure his retirement. My other deputies are young. They’re good, but I need someone with more experience.”

He glanced at Liam. “I’d like you to consider that position. It doesn’t pay the moon, but it has good benefits and this is a good town. Not too dangerous. Most importantly, it keeps you here, close to Lauren, and keeps Lauren close to her family.”

Liam looked poleaxed. His brows drew together and his lips pressed into a firm line.

“The other thing,” Dillon said, breaking the silence. “I need someone who can manage my businesses, the pub in particular. I own several in Clyde, and I’m looking to expand to an Internet presence with the retail stores.”

He was looking expectantly at Noah as he spoke, and realization crept up Noah’s spine. Noah grimaced.

“Look, I appreciate what you’re trying to do here, but it’s not necessary. We don’t want to be a fucking charity case. We can support Lauren on our own until we figure out what we’re going to do.”

“Don’t piss me off,” Dillon growled. “I wouldn’t be extending this offer if I didn’t absolutely need someone. Neither would Seth pony up something as important as a deputy’s position. Too much rides on the man he chooses. In order to keep his job as sheriff, he has to make the town happy.”

“I don’t even know what to say,” Noah murmured.

“Here’s the deal,” Dillon said bluntly. “I’m out. With Lily having our child in a very short time, there is no way in hell I’m going to put in the hours I’ve been putting in at the pub and the other businesses. She needs someone with her twenty-four seven. Michael will be cutting back on his practice hours, at least for the first while after the baby gets here, and if Seth hires another deputy to fill Jim’s position, then he won’t have to put in the extra call hours.

“Now, I want someone I can trust and someone I know will do a good job. Callie could do it, but I don’t want to lay that on her. She and Max travel frequently and the thing is, she doesn’t need the job. Max has more money than his grandchildren will spend in a lifetime. Not to mention, I don’t want my sister to shoulder that kind of a load.”

“Why did you say Lauren was worried about us?” Liam asked softly. “And how would you know this?”

Seth’s mouth turned down into a grimace. “She confided in Mom that she’s scared that you both gave up too much for her. That you won’t be happy here. She’s worried that you’ll feel too much pressure to support her and her desire to stay here with family. She’s mentioned that she wonders if she shouldn’t be willing to go back to New York so that you two can resume your lives and careers, but at the same time, it terrifies her.”

“Son of a bitch,” Noah muttered. “That’s a hell of a note.”

Liam didn’t look any happier with the news.

“Jesus, and here we’ve thought that she’s still dealing with what happened,” Liam said. “I never once imagined she had gotten such a crazy thought in her head that we wouldn’t be happy here or that for the love of God, we were making this huge sacrifice for her. Fuck that. We’re right where we want to be. That’s not changing.”

Dillon grinned broadly. “So you’ll take the jobs?”

“Whoa. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here,” Noah said. “That’s a lot to lay on us all at once. While I don’t doubt for a minute that Liam could do the job as a deputy, I have zero experience in retail.”

Dillon shrugged. “You’ve run your own business for years. Now you’ll be running mine. Business is business. If I didn’t think you were capable, believe me, I would not hand over my entire livelihood to you. I have a wife and a child to think about. Those businesses are how I support them, how I support my family.”

Noah glanced at Liam again to see a thoughtful look on his friend’s face.

“Liam?” Noah asked. “What do you think?”

Liam’s expression darkened a bit. “What I think is that we have a lot to talk to Lauren about. And a lot of points to reassure her on. She’s our fucking life. And our life is here. There’s no sacrifice too big to make to have that life with her.”

“This could go a long way in reassuring her,” Noah said quietly. “If we had jobs here. Worked with people we like. No amount of talking is going to completely convince her that we’re happy. But we can show her.”

Liam looked at Seth, a grimace etched on his forehead. “Have to tell you. I’ve been my own boss for a lot of years. I appreciate the offer, and I’ll do the best job I can, but I’ll warn you now. I’m used to doing things my way and not having a boss hanging over my shoulder all the time.”

Seth chuckled. “I never imagined you did. Look, I don’t micromanage my deputies. Do the job, and you and I will never have an issue. I’d rather you look at this as a partnership. A shared duty to protect this town. And the people we love.”

“I think I can handle that,” Liam said slowly.

“What about you?” Dillon asked Noah. “Are you in?”

“Hell, I’d be a fool not to, but we need to at least discuss my salary. I don’t come cheap you know, and eventually I plan to have children to support as well.”

Dillon threw back his head and laughed.

“You up for a trial by fire? I only have a few weeks until Lily delivers, and when that happens, I’m out. I won’t leave her. Not even for an hour. This is too important. She’s been through hell before, and over my dead body will that ever happen again.”

“Liam and I need to discuss this with Lauren. This affects her too, and I want to be sure she’s on board. And evidently, Liam and I haven’t been seeing what’s going on in her head lately. We thought . . .” He ran a hand through his hair in a weary motion. “She hasn’t been sleeping. She still has nightmares. And the fact that she’s been stressing about us . . . Goddamn. That guts me. I wish to fuck we’d known. We purposely haven’t addressed the issue of what we’ll do, because we haven’t wanted to spend even one minute away from her. She needs us. We had plenty of time to work it all out, and I wish to fuck she hadn’t worked herself in knots over it.”

“She’s a sweet woman with a heart of gold,” Seth said. “She wants what’s best for everyone around her. She never thinks of herself.”

“That shit’s got to stop,” Liam said bluntly. “Starting now.”

Noah nodded his agreement.

“How about you come into town this afternoon and fill out an application at the sheriff’s office?” Seth said to Liam. “There will be a town council meeting in a few days to announce Jim’s retirement. He’ll be happy that I found a replacement so soon, because he promised to stay on until I hired someone else, but he wants out now. And the council will listen to my recommendation. As long as you don’t have any skeletons in your closet, you’ll be a shoo-in. With your military background and your experience in personal security, the town will feel safe in your hands.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Liam said. “Noah and I appreciate this. More than you could possibly know.”

“You’re family,” Dillon said with a grin. “One of us now. Which means you’ll have the dads breathing down your neck, making sure you stay on your toes. Mom will smother you with hugs and take over your lives. And of course babysitting the new niece or nephew will keep you occupied from time to time.”

“That goes both ways,” Liam said, a gleam in his eyes. “I’m planning to have a few munchkins myself, and I can’t think of a better place to leave them than with their aunt and three uncles.”

Wonder seeped into Noah’s heart. How easily they sat talking about the future. A future with Lauren. And their children. The families spending time together and babysitting.

But first . . . First they had to ease Lauren’s fears and make sure she knew that there was nothing in the world they wouldn’t do to have her with them forever.