Every Boy's Got One

e-mails

To: Claire Harris

Darrin Caputo

Fr: Jane Harris

Re: Holly and Mark

We’re here! At the Commune di Castelfidardo, in the Municipale building, for Holly and Mark’s wedding!

For a minute it looked as if it weren’t actually going to happen. The mayor seemed to suspect all was not right with Holly and Mark’s paperwork.

But then Cal Langdon—CAL LANGDON, Mr. I Don’t Believe In Marriage Himself—stepped up and, whipping out a notepad, asked the mayor for his full name.

And when the mayor asked him just what he was doing, Cal went (according to Peter, who translated for me), “Oh, I’m a foreign affairs correspondent for The New York Journal , and I think my readers would be very interested in learning about how Le Marche officials treat American visitors to their region.”

The mayor couldn’t put his sash on fast enough! He started the wedding ceremony then and there!

CAL LANGDON SAVED THE DAY!

I wasn’t the only one who started cheering, either. Half the town seems to have turned out for the ceremony, as well!

Holly looks so pretty in her dress, which is—even though I helped her pick it out, so I am sort of complimenting myself by saying this, but it’s true—stunning. Her waist looks TINY, and she’s got a tiny bouquet of white flowers that this kid Peter made her…actually they’re garlic flowers from the garden, so you don’t want to sniff them. But she doesn’t know that, so DON’T TELL HER.

And then, solemnly, with all this dignified grace, they began the ceremony, with Holly and Mark holding hands and looking so sweet and nervous in front of them, and all of the rest of us— including, I am astonished to note, a good number of school-children, including the mayor’s own daughter, who surely should be in school—crowded all around the sides of the room. Everyone seems to be on his or her best behavior.

Well, except for Cal Langdon, who despite his earlier heroics for some reason won’t stop looking at my feet. I do have on my new Christian Louboutins, though—the ones with the rhinestone flowers over the toe straps—so that might be why. Possibly he thinks they aren’t suitable wedding attire?

The mayor opened this big book and began to read, while the secretario translated in not very good English. It’s a very moving ceremony so far, all about how they promise to live in the same house and educate their children. Marriage is obviously taken very seriously here in Italy, but they don’t seem much concerned about the for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health stuff. They just seem to want everyone to live under the same roof and go to school.

This seems very reasonable to me.

Ooooh, it’s the ring part, I have to start taking pictures, more later—

J

___________________________________________

Art. 147-Doveri Verso I Figli

Il matrimonia impone ad ambedue I conuigi l’obligo di mantenere, istruire ed educare la prole tenendo conto delle capacita, dell’inclinazione naturale e delle aspirazioni dei figli

(domando allo sposo)

Sig.LEVINE MARK dichiara di voler prendere in moglie la qui presente Sig.CAPUTO HOLLY ANN ?(si)

(ed alla sposa)

Sig.CAPUTO HOLLY ANN dichiara di voler prendere in marito il que presente Sig.LEVINE MARK ?(si)

I testimoni hanno sentito(si) (si)

IoAntonio Torelli

Ufficiale di Stato Civile del Commune di Castelfidardo Diacharo che il Sig.LEVINE MARK e la Sig.CAPUTOHOLLY ANN sono uniti in matrimonio

___________________________________________

___________________________________________

Commune di Castelfidardo

Provincia di Le Marche

Ufficio Dello Stato Civile

Certificato di Matrimonio

L’Ufficiale dello Stato Civile

Certifica

Che dal REGISTRO degli ATTI DE MATRIMONIO atto N. 1 Parte II Serie C risulta che nel giorno 23 del mese di settembre contrassero matrimonio in Castelfidardo

Mark David Levine Holly Ann Caputo

Celibe Nubile

Nato a Ohio USA Nata a Illinois USA

Cittadino Statunitense Cittadina Statunitense

___________________________________________

___________________________________________

To: Listserv

Fr: Peter Schumacher

Re: JANE HARRIS

IT IS DONE!!! The friends of JANE HARRIS have had the marriage! It was very beautiful. I hold onto the rings, and when the secretario say to me, “The rings, please,” I give them to the friends of JANE HARRIS. JANE HARRIS took many photographs. One photograph was of me giving the rings.

Then the mayor said,“Io diacharo che sono uniti in matrimonio,” and everyone in the room gives big cheer!

And then the marriage couple kiss, and everyone gives bigger cheer! And then the friend of JANE HARRIS named Cal Longdon says to everyone, “To thank you all for making this day so special for my friends, I’d like to invite everyone back to La Beccacia, where a champagne brunch is currently being set up.”

Then everyone looks at Cal Longdon strange because we do not know this word,brunch.

Then JANE HARRIS says, “Are you serious?”

And Cal Longdon says, “Yes, I am serious. I ordered it this morning.”

So now we have the lunch with JANE HARRIS and her friends! I bring my boom box so there is the music for dancing! I will dance with JANE HARRIS! YES!!!

This is Peter, #1 Fan of Wundercat!

Wundercat lives—4-eva!

Peter

___________________________________________

W E S T E R N U N I O N

T E L E G R A M

To: Ruth and Ira Levine

From: Mark Levine

Dear Mom and Dad,

Well, Holly and I did it. We’re married. Wish you could have been there. Mom, stop crying. Susie Schramm has nothing on my Holly.

Love, Mark

___________________________________________

___________________________________________

W E S T E R N U N I O N

T E L E G R A M

To: Salvatore and Marie Caputo

From: Holly Caputo

Dear Mom and Dad,

Mark and I got married this morning in Castelfidardo. Please don’t be mad. We’ll come for a visit when we get back to the States. I know you’ll love him as much as I do someday.

Love, Holly

P.S. Darrin made up the thing about getting married to cover for me, lay off him.

___________________________________________