Chapter 43

Taylor sitting on my bed does strange things to me. I want her. More than anything, I want this girl I know I shouldn’t have. But that’s never stopped me before.

I lean in to kiss her. She lifts her chin, responding to me instantly and meets my mouth with the softest kiss. I cradle her face in my hands and let my lips leave hers to wander across her jaw, then down her neck. Her smell is intoxicating and so are the breathy little sounds escaping her lips.

I take her mouth again and dip my tongue to meet hers. She kisses me back skillfully, carefully. It’s hot. Really fucking hot. I grab onto her waist and press her closer into my lap. She pulls back from my lips, looking startled. “I need you closer,” I explain.

A lazy smile crosses her lips, and I’m back to kissing her. I move to her neck again just so I can hear those sounds she makes. I press my tongue to throat and feel the way her pulse jumps. My hands move on their own and I grasp her hips, settling her even closer into my lap. Now she’s completely straddling me. Her breath comes in quick gasps and she balls my shirt in her hands. “This. Off,” she mumbles while I continue to lick and kiss her neck.

I pull back and oblige, yanking my shirt off over my head.

She brings both her hands to my bare chest and runs them over my skin, then down my stomach. I shiver under her touch and see her mouth lift in a smile.

I quickly roll us over on the bed so she’s underneath me and hitch her leg up around my waist. I push against her and she groans, deep, throaty, full of need. Her hands are on my chest again, but this time, rather than urging me closer, she’s pushing me away.

“Colt, stop.” She pushes against my chest.

I lift myself up off of her wondering what’s wrong.

Her breathing is heavy, nearly a pant and her lips are swollen and pink from kissing. “I just need a minute,” she says, still breathless.

We both roll onto our sides, facing each other, breathing heavily, the intensity still burning between us. Despite her plea, I can’t help but touch her. I grip her waist, pulling her in closer. “What is it?”

“This isn’t going to work for me.” She motions between us. “Knowing you can’t…that you don’t want a relationship…this can’t go any further.”

Crap. I let out a deep exhale, and sit up on the bed. I look down at her, still lying against my pillow. She looks tiny and confused, and so pretty and the words still come rushing out of me. “I’m sorry, Taylor, but I can’t open myself up for that. I’m not looking for a relationship.”

She sits up, matching my position. “And I’m not looking for a booty call. I can’t give myself to someone again and be crushed when they leave.”

“Me neither.” I study her. And who said I wanted her for a booty call? Does she have that little faith in me? I’ve just made her dinner and yet she still assumes the worst of me.

Realization crosses her face, and knows I’m talking about my mom. In a strange way, we both have the same fear – losing someone we love.

She wraps her arms around her knees, hugging herself. “Well then I guess we’re at a stalemate.”

I let out a frustrated growl. “Do you have any idea what you do to me?”

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