Reciprocity

CHAPTER 10

Later that day, I worked my way through an easier case file, when my email pinged with a new message from Lawrence, the prosecutor in Adam’s case. My eyes scanned over the message, and I cursed. Not news I needed to hear after such a wonderful week in paradise.

My knee bounced as I stared at the screen. The news was fucking up all of our hopes. It seemed that a dark cloud was now crashing down on us. I stood, throwing the door open and walking as fast as I could down the hall. I slammed my hand down on the open door, startling both the occupants of the large office.

Lila stared up at me. “Nate?”

“We need to take a break.”

My agitation must have been obvious, because she nodded and locked her computer. She looked over to Owen as she grabbed her jacket and swung it on. “I’ll be back.”

My fingers tangled with hers as soon as she reached me, and I practically dragged her down the hall. I pressed the call button for the elevator over and over, but she didn’t say a word. One finger slipped inside my wrist, followed by another, caressing the soft skin, and I settled down. It wasn’t enough, but it helped.

By the time we arrived at the main floor lobby, I’d calmed down enough that I was no longer dragging her along behind me. I still kept a brisk pace, one she had a little trouble keeping up with for the few blocks down the street and around the corner to Starbucks.

I shuddered, a sickening feeling overcoming me every time I passed the intersection in front of the store. The memories always bombarded me—her totaled car, her blood, her lifeless body. There was no doubt I would never overcome the images—they were burned in my brain.

The door swung open as we approached, and I caught it, holding it open and guiding her in. We ordered our drinks and waited at the end of the counter.

She never said a word, never asked what was wrong. I looked down and caught her curious gaze. In the depth of her eyes, I swear I could see every question she wouldn’t ask, and they were all laced in fear. I pulled her close and kissed her forehead, the action relaxing her a bit, and she blew out a long breath.

We found a small table and sat down. I didn’t speak, taking a sip instead. As we sat there, the anger and agitation slowly slipped away. The email had gutted me, leaving me feeling helpless, unable to protect her from the devil that haunted her.

“I didn’t know… I just found out, but they don’t charge habitual anymore for anything other than drugs,” I said, finally able to break the bad news.

Her face paled, and she dropped the cup from her lips. “Wha…what do we do now?”

I sighed and rubbed my face. “The prosecutor said he’s going to throw everything he can at him. There are a couple of class D felonies and some lesser offenses.”

“How much time is that?”

“Less than before.” I shook my head. My body felt like it was weighed down by a lead ball on my chest. “Not for the rest of his life, which is not good enough for either of us.” My anger began to boil at the thought of him on the loose, free to find her again. My jaw clenched, teeth grinding together. “It would be safer for him if he was in jail, because if I ever see his face in the world again after the trial, I will kill him.”

Lila placed her hands over my balled up fists for a brief moment before standing. I looked up at her but didn’t find the expression I expected. There was no fear. I’d just told her there was a possibility the man who’d tried to kill her more than once could be out in the world in a few short years, and she was smiling at me with tears in her eyes.

She sat down on my lap and grabbed my hands, wrapping my arms around her.

“Thank you,” she whispered. Her hand cupped my cheek and her fingers caressed my skin, lighting the familiar tingle of warmth I always got from her touch.

My eyes closed and I leaned into her hand, sighing as she soothed the beast in me. “For what?”

“For loving me that much.”

I blinked up at her. “Do you still not understand how much I love you? That I would do anything to keep you safe?”

“I do, but I also have my moments of doubt and disbelief. Fears that you’re a dream and I’ll wake up in hell again.”

My grip tightened, pulling her closer. “I’m not a figment of your imagination. Do you really think your mind would create someone so fucked up?”

She massaged the back of my neck with her fingers, making me groan. “Maybe. Why wouldn’t my mind think the perfect person for me is just as fucked up as I am?”

I smiled and leaned forward so that our foreheads were touching. “We are perfect together.”

Her lips met mine, but not in the soft kiss I was expecting. Nails scratched at my neck as her tongue asked for mine. I moaned—she was changing my mood in a very unexpected way.

“We fit perfectly together physically as well,” I said as she pulled away. Ideas of hauling her into the store’s bathroom began milling around my head. My hand moved up her thigh, grabbing the flesh beneath.

Yeah, I could use a quickie.

She rolled her eyes. “Such a horny bastard.”

“But I’m your horny bastard. And you should know, after all this time, what kissing me like that will do.”

She smiled at me all innocent-like, her bottom lip trapped between her teeth. My head was spinning, all the blood from my brain draining down to my dick.

Fuck—the things she did to me.

Nothing told me how much better Lila was getting than when Noah, Lila’s foster brother, opened the door and she hugged him. Granted, she’d known him for a long time and trusted him, was open with him in ways only myself and few others knew of. It really shouldn’t have surprised me. Lila was reserved, except with those she trusted.

The only other time I’d seen him was that day with Adam, and I was too concerned with her to get a good look at him. Noah was average, overall—a little shorter than my six-two and about my weight as well. Dark brown hair was thick on his head, and his brown eyes were soft as he looked down at her.

When a short little brunette came to the door, I was shocked when Lila wasted no time wrapping her arms around her as well. It was obvious I didn’t know everyone who made up her very short list.

“Nathan, this is my wife, Camilla,” Noah said.

I held out my hand but was knocked back by the small woman practically tackle-hugging me. “It’s so wonderful to meet the man who was able to open up our Lila.” She pulled back, smiling at me.

I blinked at her, too stunned to find words. Lila wrapped her hands around my arm and kissed my shoulder.

Noah ushered us into the living room, offering up drinks as we went, and based on his tone months ago, I knew I’d need one.

“Thanks,” I said as I took a bottle of beer from him. A squeal drew my attention, and I turned to find Lila and Camilla going through the wedding photos we’d brought with us.

“You look so beautiful,” Camilla said to Lila. “I wish we could have come, but with the twins, money’s tight.”

“It’s okay. It would have been great if you could have made it.”

Camilla sighed, a wistful look on her face.

“She wanted to go so bad,” Noah said from next to me, drawing my attention back to him. “But Mari was just in the hospital for a lung infection. Medical bills were and are piling up. Plus, there was no way I could get off with the short notice.”

“No need to explain. I know you would have dropped everything to be there for her.”

He stared at her, watching. “She’s changed so much in the last year, and I know that’s all due to you.”

“Even I can see the change.” I glanced over at her and smiled. Damn. She was so beautiful when she was smiling and at ease.

“It’s so much better than the sickly skinny, mousy girl who ran from the room as soon as Armando or I entered.”

My teeth mashed together. “After seeing the monster, I can understand why.”

Noah nodded. “She still had the bruises and cuts when she came to live with us.” I turned to him, and his eyes seemed far away. He turned to me, back to the present, and sighed. “Her arm was in a cast, and she favored her left side. It took over a week for me to hear her voice because she wouldn’t speak. Even though she was safe, she was afraid she’d be hit.”

I was reeling, my hand tightening on the bottle. She’d alluded to what Noah said, but never delved into it.

“Fuck… Dealing with walking on eggshells all the time, I have no clue how she could stand to be near my ass.” I blew out a breath. “I was a bomb waiting to explode, only to detonate and recharge.”

He took a sip as he contemplated. “The difference with you is that Lila knows what makes good and what makes evil. She could tell you were good long before she knew it. When she first came to us, her reactions were due to habit rather than fear. Granted, there was fear, but more because of the unknown.”

My gaze flickered back to her. “It’s amazing she had the strength to get herself out. Most don’t.”

“No, they don’t, but Lila’s an observer. That last attack only proved to her that if she didn’t get out, it would be no time before she was in a shallow grave and labeled a runaway. She was never going to get away—he’d never let her.”

The thought sickened me, even more so since she said okay to starting a family. Her hesitancy made more sense—she never thought she’d live long enough for a future. Her youth wasn’t about popularity contests or the clothes she wore. It was about survival. Getting through one day in order to wake in another. Every day since probably felt like borrowed time, so she never dreamed.

It was like Jack said—going through the motions, but not living.

I wanted to go to the jail and beat her fucking stepbrother with a crow bar, bash his skull to a pulp, then drive out to the fucking shack in the middle of nowhere that she grew up in, cut off her father’s balls, and burn it to the ground with him and his bitch wife inside.

The beast liked that idea.

Five babies. Grace miscarried four, and the fifth was lost in the accident. I’d lost five of my own, while he was helping his only one into an early grave.

“She doesn’t talk about that time, at least not in this much detail.”

He nodded. “I figured, but I also felt these were things you need to know. I can tell you know her better than anyone, but at the same time, you’re missing key pieces. Her scars weren’t a one-time thing. Adam is sick and twisted, out for her blood. He would have killed her, if you hadn’t gotten there.”

“I know.” I swallowed and dropped my head a little as my stomach twisted.

“The trial is going to be very rough on her. What I told you is going to come up. Every haunted memory of each hit, slap, threat… It’ll all come out.”

I glanced up from my beer. “You’ve been through this before.”

He stared at me and pursed his lips before letting out a sigh. “I put my father in jail for life.”

My head bobbed up and down. “Lila said you were in a similar situation.”

Noah stared out across the room, then took a sip. “He beat me and my mother all the time. When I was fourteen, he finally hit her so hard it killed her. I lost it. All my life he’d been taller than me, but at that time, we were the same. He was stronger, but I was still able to beat him unconscious.”

“So sorry.”

He shrugged. “It’s over and done. Now, I have a beautiful wife and kids. I only wish their grandmother was alive to see them. It’ll get better with time.”

“It’s going to be rough over the next few months, but I can’t wait until the trial is over.”

Noah’s expression changed, and his eyes flickered to Lila, worry filling his face. “The danger isn’t over then.” I tensed, remembering one of the reasons we were here—Noah had news on the Marconi. “They’re still watching you.”

I blew out a breath and pulled on the back of my neck. “Has it been recently?”

Noah nodded. “There are some dirty cops out there that are more interested in money. There’s a big case being launched against him, so he’s got tails on everyone involved in the case.”

“But I’m not involved.”

“No, but who has the most information against him? Who does he still hold a grudge against?”

“Fuck.” I understood then—we would never be safe.