Reciprocity

CHAPTER 20

The next day, I was a wreck.

Meeting Tom was a mistake.

Granted, it wasn’t like I planned to run into him. That was what made it worse. If Marconi had someone watching us at that moment, I was screwed. It was a chance meeting that could get Lila killed.

An innocent fucking errand that brought the devil down.

After what Noah told me, I knew it wasn’t an “if” someone was watching. I’d recognized one of his men sitting in the corner as we talked. Marconi probably thought I was working the case.

I needed to figure out a way to keep Lila safe.

My mind was cracking, and the beast paced, whimpering. Everything was spiraling out of control. I was losing my grip.

It was times like this the beast in me was let out. Nothing calmed it more than Lila. My body ached only for her touch. I needed it to survive. I’d die without it—without her. She let me ravage her, letting go in ways no other would. Euphoria and comfort—the soothing balm to my screaming agony.

I couldn’t go hunt her down and drag her off. I needed her to come to me, so I picked up my cell phone and texted her.

Need you. Now.

I tossed it back down on my desk and rubbed my face. My foot tapped on the floor as I listened to the tick of the clock, waiting for her response. Wound tight, my muscles locked down. I needed to relax.

There was a light knock on the door, and I sighed. I didn’t even have to say anything before the handle spun and Lila walked in. She flicked the lock on my door, a devilish smirk on her lips.

In her hand was a fresh cup of coffee, which she set on my desk as she walked up to me. She was silent, reserved…submissive. Exactly what I needed.

I turned my chair, following her movement as she sunk down to her knees in front of me. I wet my lips as I leaned forward, my hand gripping the back of her neck as I kissed her. It wasn’t soft—it was rough and needy.

I stood up and moved to free my aching hard-on. Her eyes followed my hands as they moved to my crotch. I palmed my cock and groaned at the hungry look in her eyes as she stared at it.

“See how much I need my cock slut?”

She nodded, licking her lips as I pulled down the zipper and reached inside. My cock was hard and hot, ready to mark her as I pulled it out. I moaned, pumping it in my hand as I looked down at the sexy sight of my wife on her knees before me, looking up at me, eager for my cock.

“Stay still.” I adjusted my stance and ran the head across her lips, my mouth open as her lips parted, tongue teasing my slit.

My eyes rolled back and my toes curled when her lips wrapped around the head of my cock, the sensitive edge overstimulated, making me shake. Nothing in the world was better than Lila wrapped around me. Her sweet mouth moved down, making me shake as my entire length slid in and the tip eased down her throat.

I hissed out a “fuck.” She’d gotten so good at deep-throating me over the last year.

My fingers tangled in her hair, fisting it as I guided her luscious mouth up and down my hard shaft. I was seconds away from holding her head still and fucking the shit out of her mouth. The twisted and sexy thing was that she’d let me, and she’d enjoy it.

Lila made it all disappear. Being inside her, all my thoughts and worries were replaced with white, mindless bliss.

My balls were so tight, cock so hard—I was about to come.

My eyes flickered around, trying to take my mind off the intense pleasure of her mouth. I needed more, needed to last longer. Her coffee cup was sitting on the edge of my desk, steam coming off the top. It was black, and not the way she took her coffee.

A wicked grin formed on my face, and I looked down at her.

“Do you want some cream in your coffee, slut?”

She hummed around me and tried to speak—the vibration made my eyes close and almost tipped me over the edge. I was so close to exploding. My hands released her hair, and I leaned over, my cock popping from her lips as I grabbed her cup. She chased after me with her mouth, her tongue lapping at my tip.

I grabbed my cock and gave it a tug, then slapped it against her lips. She smiled up at me as my hand worked up and down, teasing the underside of the head, getting me that last little bit further before I popped.

Her mouth was open and waiting. My whole body tensed, every muscle coiled tight. The first explosive bursts landed in her mouth, then I pulled away and let the remainder land in the cup.

“Don’t swallow,” I said with heavy breaths. She did as I asked, her mouth open as I finished off, emptying into her coffee.

When I was done, I held the mug in front of her as she let my come roll off her tongue into it. I set it back down on my desk, a hard shudder running through me as she sucked the last drop from the tip.

I felt lighter and a bit sleepy as I slumped back down in my chair. “Fuck, I needed that.”

She grabbed a tissue from the box on my desk and wiped away any leftovers. My hand reached out and ran through her hair, straightening out the mess I’d made. “I have a meeting, but don’t worry. I’ll get you tonight.”

She smiled and stood up, then leaned forward for a kiss. “Can’t wait.” She turned and headed for the door.

“Don’t forget your coffee,” I called after her.

Turning around, she picked it up and brought it to her lips, taking a sip. She let out a little moan, smiling as she licked her lips.

“Perfect.” She winked at me and took another sip, then headed out the door.

Fuck, she was naughty. I fucking loved it.

My little afternoon tryst with Lila helped calm me, but didn’t disperse with the threat hanging over me. Making it worse was that it wasn’t just me anymore—I had Lila to protect. With my dying breath, I would make sure she was safe.

Which led me to my current dilemma.

I walked into my home office and sat at my desk, swiveling the chair around to face the closed closet door.

It was mad…crazy…insane for me to think about what was in there and what I could do with it. The box was buried under other file boxes. A label reading “Taxes 2008” was affixed to the exterior.

The only tax documents inside were Via Marconi’s. My insurance resided there as well.

Phone records, witness accounts, photos, etc.—enough evidence to tie Vincent Marconi to over five deaths and seven felonies. It only scratched the surface, but it was enough to get him put away for life and begin having his operation dissected, which would lead to his empire being torn apart.

I wasn’t going into the situation again believing that everything would be fine. His daughter still had five years left to serve before even the possibility of parole. Until then, and probably even after, I was a marked man.

What pissed me off was that the little bit of invisibility I’d had, the shadowing from his vision, was blown away because someone in an office where I no longer worked was forming a case against him. Marconi knew what I had on him—I was stupid enough to gloat in his face that he was next. Between that and the death of Grace and my baby, he was satisfied for the time-being. Happy to keep me scared and buried in my own personal hell.

It was to the point of being damned if I do, or damned if I don’t. Seeing me with Tom would raise a red flag to Vincent. His first intuition would tell him I was working with them.

I was a dead man.

“Nate?”

I looked to the door to find Lila standing there, a worried expression on her face. “Yeah?”

She walked into the room and stood in front of me. “Didn’t you hear me calling?”

I shook my head. “Sorry, I was lost in thought.”

She pursed her lips. “What’s wrong?”

I sighed and pulled her close, leaning forward to rest my head on her stomach. “Running into Tom Preston has fucked things up, and I’m afraid for us.” Her fingers moved through my hair, nails scratching, calming. I pulled back to look up at her. “What do I do to protect you?”

“Protect me?”

“You know from who, and now I’m left with this decision. We’re at a fork in the road, but which way will kill us?” My chest clenched, and I nuzzled into her. “I’m not sure there’s an alternative at this point.” I looked back up at her, pleading to anything that would listen. “The most important thing to me is keeping you alive.”

Her brow scrunched up, and she shook her head. “There is no life for me without you.”

My chest tightened, and I pulled her to my lap, holding her close. I didn’t know if there was enough hope and prayers to deities above to keep her safe, but I’d do whatever it took. Even if it meant killing the devil myself.

The next morning, I pulled three expanding files along with a manila file out of my bag and set them on my desk. After soaking in my wife, I’d broached the box that haunted me and emptied its contents. They stared at me, and I stared back. It hurt me to even touch them, to bring them back out into the light of day.

Memories and heartbreak tore at me all evening. Nightmares that were too real haunted my dreams. I couldn’t stop touching Lila, my worst fears killing me from the inside out. My heart begged me not to do it, but at the same time, it wanted justice—the files could help with that.

I sat at my desk, my fingers running across my lips as I looked at their worn edges. Sending them to Tom would make things worse. Then again, I was already on the Marconi hitlist. The information would help in his case—I had no doubt about that—but I had to be discreet about delivery. There was no way I could walk up to Tom and hand it to him—we’d both be dead that day.

I sat back and rubbed my face.

Sending the files could help keep Lila safe. If Marconi was convicted, he might leave her alone. He might stop keeping tabs.

I stood and picked up the files, heading out of my office and down the hall. I needed help and guidance. Who better than someone I trusted and had lost the same person I had?

“Hey, Cassie, is Jack available?” I smiled down at his secretary.

“Hi, Nathan.” She looked down at her computer. “You’re in luck. He’s got a break right now and he just got off the phone.”

“Thanks.” I stepped forward and knocked on the door.

“Come in,” Jack called from inside.

I opened the door and walked through, closing it behind me. He smiled at me from across his desk, his gaze narrowing on the files in my hand.

“How are you doing, Nate?”

I sat down in the chair across from him and placed the files on the edge of his desk as I leaned back.

“I ran into Tom Preston the other day.” I jumped right in.

“Oh yeah? How’s he doing these days?”

“He’s working on a case against Vincent Marconi.”

The smile slid from his face. “Jesus.”

“I’m pretty sure we were spotted together.”

“How do you know?”

“Lila’s foster brother is a cop. He told me Marconi’s men, along with some dirty cops, were tailing those involved with the case. The list includes me.”

“But why you? You aren’t involved with it.”

I leaned forward and placed my finger on the stack of files. “Because of this.”

His face paled. “All of your information on them.” He looked back at me. “You kept it all?”

I nodded. “It was a bit of insurance, along with not knowing what the hell to do with it. You know how bad things were back then.”

He leaned back and ran a hand through his white hair. “Nathan… What do you want to do with it? Why is it here?”

I pursed my lips. “That’s the big question I’ve been struggling with. Grace died because of them. If there’s a strong case against them, I want to give them more ammo. But…”

“You’re afraid.” A pained look crossed his face.

“They already saw me talking to Tom, even if it was only a chance run-in and small talk. They know I have all this.” I waved my hand at the file. “Pretty certain the whole fucking thing red flagged me. If my life is in that much danger because they think I’m helping them, I’d rather someone put this to use.”

“Do we have to go through all this again?” His head was down, shaking. “You’re so happy now.”

I tried not to think about Lila, but it was useless. The road was about to get very rough, and I’d need her strength.

“I’m not resigning myself to death. I have too much hope for a future to do that. But I’m not going to live like everything is fine, oblivious…not like last time.”

“Have you talked to Lila about this?”

I sighed. “A little. She caught that something was off. She’s been so happy since the trial, and I made her cry last night. We’ve even been working on a b-baby.” I stuttered on the word. My chest was tight, and I rubbed at the spot.

Jack’s eyes were soft. “What can I do to help?”

I let out a shuddering breath. “I can’t just hand this file to Tom.”

“You’d be dead before the day was over.”

I nodded. “I need a way so it’s not traceable to me.”

Jack stared at the files, humming as he tapped his fingers on his desk. “You know, Mary has a niece that works for Michael Lawson. Last I was down there, his office was two doors down from Tom’s.” My eyes grew wide, hopeful. “And Jenny, Mary’s niece, just so happens to be coming over this weekend.”

“Is that far enough removed?” Bad enough I was involving Jack, but my former mother-in-law and her family as well?

He lips set into a thin line. “No, you’re right. We need another step.”

My brain fired off ideas, each wilder and more extreme than the one before. “What if she put it in a courier envelope with a random address and sends it to Tom?”

Jack thought it over for a moment. “Do you want to risk it with this information?”

I blew out a breath. “What other choice do we have? Besides, I asked around, and Michael Lawson’s name did not come up as being associated with the case against Marconi. No one would be watching his office.”

Jack scratched at his jaw as he stared at the files. “I’ll get it wrapped up in a code-locked courier bag and have her send it that way.”

“How do we get him the code?”

“Leave that to me. I’ll figure it out.”

I was silent, unsure of how to thank him. “I can’t let it happen again, but I don’t know what to do to stop it.”

Jack’s eyes were soft, full of understanding. “This will help. And try to stay calm—Lila needs you.”

“Not as much as I need her. She’s stronger than I am.”

Jack shook his head. “When it comes to you, Lila is the weakest woman on the planet.”

I blinked at him. Fuck. He had a point. We were so codependent on each other that it was almost debilitating to even think of life without the other.