The Book of Firsts

Nine

On Monday I kept seeing the Three Kings everywhere, always together. First in the corridor as I was heading to class. Then, because I’d forgotten to bring lunch, standing in the line next to mine and slightly ahead of me, in the main refectory. Then as I was heading to the bus.

It seemed I’d need to keep myself extra busy Mondays and Tuesday morning, or I’d spend all my time thinking of them, particularly now that I didn’t know whether my day would involve hickeys, a massage, or the next big step. Tuesday lunchtime, I admit to being disappointed seeing Bran. Gorgeous he might be, but I’d connected with him less, and was wary of the way he’d spoken to me on the weekend. And I’d wanted it to be Rin, wanted something vigorous and non-teasing and hopefully satisfying.

He was standing in the middle of the garden with hands buried in blazer pockets, staring at his shoes. By the time I was over the wall, I’d set aside frustration and replaced it with curiosity. He’d been an incredible kisser. Would he win effortlessly today as well?

He looked up, and I caught a glimpse of open doubt before his expression switched to something completely neutral.

Deciding this needed to be settled, I said: "The initial question’s already been answered. Do you want to leave it at that?"

"You’re backing out?"

I could see I’d surprised him, as if it hadn’t occurred to him that his attitude toward me might dim my enthusiasm.

"I’m saying that you’re free to," I said, firmly. "This isn’t a game that will work if one of the players is in two minds about participating."

"You think you know my mind?" he said, harsh voice cracking, but he caught himself up, met my eyes a moment, and then turned his back on me.

I went across to the big wooden picnic table tucked into the corner where the wall and the administration building met, and sat cross-legged on top of it. "Liked the idea better in abstract?"

"That’s—" He stopped, scowling. "I don’t know you," he explained. "I’ve no reason to trust you."

"Trust?" I laughed. "What do you think I’m going to do? If this story gets out, yes, I suppose you’d be spattered with a bit of mud. I’d be drowned in it. An ocean of hate. It would probably even undermine my plans for the future."

"Then why are you doing this?" He crossed to stand before me. "Whatever you find relaxing, you still don’t know us. Even if you trust us not to be people who’d use this against you, how can you do…so much with utter strangers?"

"But I’m not." I considered him, then said: "I think you need a massage way more than me. Sit down. Sit."

He almost baulked, but gave in, sitting down on the bench attached to the side of the picnic table. I shifted so I could comfortably reach his shoulders.

"Rin’s a little confusing because his public reputation doesn’t match the way he talks to me," I said, working with an extremely tense set of muscles. "He’s obviously close to his family and you two, and acts obliging and polite, but I have the impression he operates on light goodwill with most people while not actually liking them very much. Kyou…Kyou is stimulated by a certain amount of risk-taking, but it’s carefully calculated, and I doubt he’d go near anything which had only a small chance of success. He enjoys ritual, and likes to push boundaries, and likes even more when he meets friendly resistance, but for all that he’s very courteous and gains, I think, genuine enjoyment from helping people. You…"

I paused as he shifted beneath my hands, and I dug my fingers into his shoulders extra enthusiastically before going on.

"You’re extremely private, and I don’t know you particularly well yet. I suppose it amused you to suggest me for your competition when you saw me listening, but you didn’t expect it to go anywhere. Now that Rin and Kyou seem enthusiastic, you don’t want to disappoint them by ending the game early."

He snorted, and I grinned.

"Don’t tell me what parts of all that I’ve got wrong—I’m sure some of my impressions are a little out. The point I’m making is that I’ve come to know you a little. We shared a kiss after I’d spent a week or two finding things out about you three, and Rin and Kyou at least talked to me first. Later, they gave me a nice massage and we chatted, and I decided I liked them enough for more kissing. And so on. It never was a single decision, and any of us might back out at any time. Tell me about rowing."

"What?"

"Rowing. I’m guessing that’s not something you three have been doing since kindergarten. How’d you get into it?"

He clicked his tongue, but the tension had gone out of his shoulders.

"We tried a bunch of clubs first year here, and rowing was the one with the fewest gawpers getting in the way. And Kyou likes it. Rin is more neutral because he doesn’t like the early morning cold. I just wanted to pick something and stop changing clubs. Swap places."

I moved without comment, and sat quietly as he explored my shoulders and began experimentally kneading. Not a practiced masseuse, but attentive to my reactions.

"I saw Venetian Masquerade made it on to the voting list for the dance."

"Mm. The Art Club is working on posters now, and some people from the Rose Court are going to sponsor it. All very complicated just for an end-of-year dance."

"End of school. End of friendships. The dance is taken very seriously."

"Really? Well, if nothing else, I’ll enjoy the costumes."

Bran checked the time on his phone, then said: "There’s a segment of formal dancing lessons every year here, as part of the sporting curriculum. Have you learned any?"

"One session a couple of years ago. A big group dance."

"I’ll teach you. Next time."

He stood, and in a single swift movement climbed from the table to the top of the wall, and walked along it a few steps before jumping down the far side.

An improvement. I still wasn’t entirely sure I could continue the challenge with Bran, but would probably know after the next session.

And now I had a second challenge to rate. This one was a reversal, with Kyou in first place, for while he had taken the definition of a massage to an extreme, I had enjoyed it enormously, while Rin’s effort had been several steps up from Bran’s. I entered the ratings, and mentally totted up the scores. First and last combined amounted to fourteen points, while two seconds gave Rin twelve.

It would be impossible for me to not keep a mental tally. And too tempting to keep things even, to balance results so none of them lagged significantly behind. None of them would enjoy being last, but they wanted an honest competition, and so I would do my best to give them that.

Friday brought a brilliant blue sky and a warmth to defy the slide into autumn.

"Mika! Come eat with us. I’m not taking no for an answer."

Smiling at Lania, Carr, and a curly-haired girl I didn’t know, I casually flipped shut the cover of my phone. "You’ll have to, I’m afraid. I’m all booked up today."

"This is Hanni," Carr said. "Once Art Club, but we lost her to hockey."

I managed not to react to the name, exchanging greetings.

"You seriously need to play more often, Mika," Lania said. "Do you ever do anything except study?"

"Art Club."

"Where we work you mercilessly." Carr offered me a slow smile. "And, since the model for the cake stall was very popular, we’ve plans for several more. If you’re busy now, how about after school? We often get together on Friday afternoons down at the Tokley Centre. Surely your study schedule can manage a couple of hours."

"Have you seen my study schedule?"

"You’ll work better after a good meal and a bit of fun," Lania said. "And since we drive, you’ll probably get home only a little later than you would taking that bus."

The bus trip, though relatively short, was my least favourite part of my day, but it was the particular day of the year that made me hesitate. My nineteenth birthday, and I’d woken feeling the emptiness of my small apartment, and the long distance between me and my family. After a moment I said: "You make a good point. Thanks guys."

"Great! It’ll be fun!"

The curly-haired girl’s gaze was focused past my shoulder. "You should come too, Ky. The Tokley Centre fountain at four for the game centre and then dinner."

A familiar voice immediately behind me said: "I’ll pass." Direct, disinterested, and absolute.

Aware of a wash of unexpected cross-currents, I turned to discover Kyou and Carr in an exchange of not-quite-unfriendly looks.

"More important things to do, Westhaven?" Carr asked, surprising me with his flat tone.

"Other things."

"Have you met Mika, Kyou?" Lania put in hastily. "She’s new this year."

"Exam papers," Kyou said, looking at me. "Did you find what you needed?"

"Yes, thanks," I said, matching his casual tone, and I suddenly knew, just from the way he held himself, that I would be having Kyou for my birthday.

"You’re not doing mock exams already? Mika, you’re insane."

"Competitive course." I smiled at Hanni and felt a little awful for her, remembering Bran telling Kyou the girl was in love with him, causing her name to be immediately wiped from their list of prospects. I watched her face as Kyou nodded to our group and left, and let myself for a moment think about the number of people in this school who felt as she did for the three who were my lunchtime entertainment.

By the time I’d made my goodbyes and left the Art Club behind, a green dot had appeared on the phone app. I climbed over the wall, and was seated neatly at the table when Kyou emerged with the steaming teapot.

"No missed strokes this time?"

His expression didn’t flicker, but I could just imagine a virtual Challenge Level Increased sign over his head.

"None," was all he said, and set the tray.

We drank tea, and talked a little about exams, and the professor whose Engineering Physics course I was aiming for at Helios U, which would hopefully lead me into the Marden Institute, a government-funded physics and engineering lab which was my ultimate goal. All the time his eyes held mine, and the air filled with tense anticipation. We drank only one cup, and then Kyou took the tray back inside, and I looked up at the brilliant sky.

"You’re getting along well with the Art Club."

"Yes." I shot him an amused glance as he walked towards me. "That was a good suggestion of Rin’s."

He smiled faintly, then walked behind me.

My hair was currently just over shoulder-length, and I had it in a high ponytail. Kyou pulled the tie loose, and rearranged locks carefully, then circled to consider me. I matched him, stare for stare, but couldn’t resist a little juddering breath of anticipation when he reached forward to remove my tie.

"Feet," he murmured, placing the tie on the table.

I lifted one foot, and he dropped to his haunches to remove my shoes and socks. He put them neatly together beneath the table, looked up at me, and then slid his hands along the top of my thighs, up under my skirt, his thumbs lightly tracing the curve of flesh. Finding my underpants, he hooked fingers into either side of them, and I had to lift so he could pull them down.

One thing this competition had prompted me to do was invest in some nice underwear sets. Just matching cotton things, and today’s was a red tartan pattern which Kyou held up, cocking an amused eyebrow, before neatly folding them next to my tie.

Standing, he drew me up so we were very close indeed, brushing my stomach as he removed my skirt. He slid his hands up my spine to unhook my bra, and I had to wriggle a little to help him take it off while leaving my shirt on. Then he undid every button but the topmost, and stepped back a second time to enjoy the result.

"Something to keep the sun off?" I asked, glancing down. I rather liked this look. Kyou obviously did.

Deciding to redress the imbalance in clothing, I found his belt and made a slow business of unbuckling it, enjoying the way he kept his gaze fixed on the small glimpses he could catch of my breasts as I moved. In turn, I kept my attention focused entirely on his face, watching every nuance of his expression, not even glancing down at the body I was revealing, even when I knelt to remove his shoes, and then his underpants.

My shirt came off last. He settled it neatly over the back of one of the chairs, and looked at me expectantly. Always with him it was this challenge, this anticipation of pushing boundaries, of not backing down.

I stepped forward, still watching nothing but his expression as all those naked parts of us pressed together. He was hard against my stomach. My breasts flattened against his chest. Both of us inhaled, and then let our breath out at the exact same moment, and I smiled, and finally dropped my gaze as I lowered my mouth to the same spot in the hollow of the shoulder where I’d marked Rin.

I’d decided to put their hickeys in the same spots, for all that it would be problematic if they wandered around together with their shirts off. But the symmetry of it pleased me, and so I worked my way down Kyou just as I had Rin, though Kyou reacted differently at first, curling his hand around the back of my neck, and then tangling his fingers through my hair. He stopped that, though, as I worked on the third hickey, and I made sure to give him a particularly thorough one there, and when I was done, I looked up at him through lowered lashes, my cheek still pressed against him.

His eyes were very wide, but then they narrowed, and he stepped back. Reaching down to the seat of the unused patio chair, he picked up a folded blanket and, walking to the centre of the biggest stretch of grass, spread it with a flick of his wrists.

"Lie down. On your stomach."

Challenge upon challenge, and my own smile widened as I paced with slow deliberation toward him, keeping my eyes once again focused only on his. Stopping when I felt cloth beneath my bare feet, I knelt, and paused for a long moment gazing up at him. Even naked and erect he managed an appearance of calm control—though I suspected it was a thin veneer at the moment, as I leaned forward on my hands, and then lay flat, folding my arms beneath my chin.

Closing my eyes, I found myself supremely aware of all the little things that usually went on in the background. The breeze making leaves clatter, and playing across my sun-warmed skin. Distant shouts from the sports fields, and a hum that must be the chatter from the refectory. A deeper, lower rush from the nearest road. The faintest, tiniest sound made by Kyou’s steps as he walked behind me.

I knew that he’d stand there, not moving, until both of us could hardly bear it, and when he finally knelt and bent over me, the movement was so careful that I didn’t hear it at all, only felt the weight on the blanket. It took everything I had to not tense up, to not show how excited I was, how badly I wanted him to abandon all these silly rules and just do something.

I felt his breath, then his tongue, the faintest graze in the small of my back. I grit my teeth to prevent an audible response, but he had won this round, the tiniest sigh escaping me as his mouth fastened on my skin.

The next hickey he placed between my shoulder blades, and all the while his swollen head rubbed against the back of my legs. I had to give it to him—Kyou had a ton of control.

He tested himself even further by sliding slowly up, an inch-by-inch progress that had to be maddening for both of us, to whisper into my ear: "Turn over."

I turned. Not in a rush, but impatience was winning with me—for all this was not going to go anywhere satisfactory—and so I did not draw it out, simply shifting in the small amount of room I had between the cage made by his arms and legs. At least I managed to keep my face calm as he looked down at me, letting his weight come down on me before he fastened his mouth to the side of my throat.

Not a cautious choice, not what I’d expected from Kyou, who balanced risk and excitement so carefully, and had to realise that a love bite in a visible spot would start people wondering who had given it to me. But my confusion vanished as I remembered the afternoon get-together he’d passed up. Whatever was going on between Kyou and Carr, it had spurred him to mark me. A little game of possession.

He was more than thorough, but finally raised his head.

"I’m not sure it’s possible for a person to look any smugger."

"Let me give that a try," he replied, and did indeed seem even more pleased with himself as he bent his head to finish the challenge, kissing me thoroughly.

In response I slid one hand between his stomach and mine, taking hold of him. He jerked once, but then kissed me harder, and I amused myself by gripping him even more firmly, then rubbing my thumb slowly on his head. He couldn’t keep still with that, pushing forward.

I was so ready for him, really aching, and it would have been so simple to get him inside me. But instead, I reached down between my legs with my free hand and then brought my fingers up slick and sticky, and wrapped both my hands about him. I doubted his expression was at all smug then. He shuddered, and began to pump.

I did my best to keep my hands in place, and thought Kyou lucky that I don’t have long fingernails. He didn’t hold back, going fast and hard, making my stomach and hands hot from the friction. Even though he wasn’t where I wanted him, I still gasped a little when he came.

For a moment he let his whole weight rest on me, then lifted his head and looked down at me. A most unreadable expression, not smug at all. Then he brushed my forehead with his lips before shifting so he was beside me. For a minute we just lay there, watching a red and gold butterfly chart its erratic course across the brilliant blue above.

Kyou sat up, grimacing down at his lower chest, then looked down at my stomach. His expression changed subtly, and he slid two fingers through white, then leaned forward and pushed them inside me.

I’d anticipated him, just, and so simply said: "Additional firsts?"

But I was excited, hopeful, and not inclined to hide it completely as he moved a little further along the blanket and pushed those two fingers deeper. His left hand touched my thigh, then settled so the fingers rested on the crease of my leg. The thumb slid gently down, demonstrating he had a working knowledge of female anatomy, and I closed my eyes as he made a circular motion in a very good spot indeed.

When I opened them again, I didn’t look back at Kyou, but gazed up into the blue-drenched sky, and listened to the wind, and the distant hum of a school full of people who had no notion of the leisurely progress Kyou made with small, unrelenting touches, and steady pressure. He had slender hands, and managed to get a large portion of one inside me, while never ceasing the movement of the thumb of his other hand. I felt as if I was floating, and at the same time completely focused, until at last the sky disappeared in a grey static haze, and my body tightened so intensely it hurt.

Kyou freed his hands, and I unclenched mine. I’d been holding the edge of the blanket so tightly the stitches were imprinted into my skin. My other hand was full of blades of grass torn loose. My heart pounding, I took a gulping breath and then lifted my arms to close around Kyou’s neck as he lowered himself back on me, and we kissed at length, my legs wrapping around him. I already wanted him again, and tangled my fingers in his hair as his kisses began to rove to my throat, and then he settled into sucking my breasts, very hard, occasionally moving to add several more love bites around the one Rin had marked.

His phone rang.

Kyou growled, but got up immediately, explaining: "Rin wouldn’t call now unless it was an emergency."

Sitting up, I watched him cross to fish his phone from his blazer pocket, and then followed his gaze as he turned abruptly and stared above the trees. The vast blue I had fallen into was smudged with grey.

"Be right there," Kyou said, put his phone on the table and strode briskly to the rear of the summer house.

Hearing the tap running, I stood and fetched a couple of towels and brought them around, then paused to enjoy Kyou rinsing lather from his front. Handing one of the towels over, I said: "What’s on fire?"

"The boat house."

He was already on the move, drying himself as he headed back inside. I didn’t hurry, soaping myself thoughtfully, not interested so much in a fire as thinking back on what we’d just done, and being pleased. And I was further pleased when, knotting his tie, Kyou ducked around the corner again and leaned close to whisper in my ear: "Next week. Without fail."

I took my time dressing, and cleaned up the hidden garden, wondering what impact a burning boat house would have on who won the Thursday competitions.

Bran had left his run too late. He could not possibly catch up on what I knew they considered one of the most important firsts. But either way, next week I would have one of them. Kyou or Rin.

After school, I headed to the student carpark and spotted Lania waving at me from the front passenger seat of Carr’s blue station wagon. He’d explained during the museum trip that he’d chosen it to fit canvasses and art supplies. I climbed in, wondering if it would be worth it to talk my parents into purchasing a car, since the buses seemed to be increasingly crowded, and once or twice I’d had to wait for the next one. But getting a licence involved a set number of co-driving hours, and that just wasn’t practical on a number of levels.

"Hey Mika," Carr said, pausing a moment for me to buckle up before he pulled out.

"Yay, Mika!" Lania was hyped. "We’re winning you away from your books."

"At least for the afternoon," I said.

"What happened to your neck?" Lania asked, peering at me sympathetically.

It took some effort not to lift one hand to hide evidence, but I’d been clever about incriminating hickeys and said "Scratched it on a twig," with the faintest of shrugs and total truth, since I had taken a twig and scored a red mark right through the centre of Kyou’s little declaration, and then stuck a round sticking plaster over the top, so that the ends of the scratch were visible on either side.

"How often do you do these outings?" I asked, to avoid further questions.

"Once or twice a month. Sometimes we meet later, and do a proper Friday night thing, but too many of us have annoying curfews."

"Mainly people from the Art Club?"

"I guess that’s the core," Carr said.

"No, Class 7C is," Lania said. "During first year our Home Room was Class 7C, with Hanni, Anika, Sean, Dao-Ku, Raj. Everyone else is people from our clubs, or people we’re dating, or just someone who comes along."

"Sounds like a long-time group. Are you all planning to go to Helios U as well?"

"It’s the first choice for those continuing with study," Carr said. "If your course is as competitive as you say, what will you do if you don’t get in?"

"The other primary options are in the US, Britain, or the Netherlands," I said. "I haven’t decided yet. MIT, perhaps, but it’s just as competitive to get into."

"And so you’ll move on again and have to get to know a whole new set of people?" Lania asked. "I don’t know if I could stand that!"

"Well, I’m working to avoid it," I said equably, and let myself enjoy their care in introducing me to their friends, and seeing that I wasn’t made to feel an outsider. I particularly appreciated the serving of gossip everyone handed out about the fire at the boat shed.

"Most likely someone smoking," the muscular boy called Raj said authoratively.

"Wrong!" Sean’s eyes were wide with the delight of gossip. "I got down fast—before half the school turned up and the teachers sent us back—and you could smell the petrol!"

"Arson?" Anika, one of the many loosely crowding three tables of the buffet-style restaurant, exchanged a fascinated and unhappy glance with Hanni. "Someone who has it in for the Rowing Club? Or the school generally?"

Sean, with a glance at Carr, added: "Or just the Three Kings?"