When I Surrender

Chapter Nineteen Knox

Seeing McKenna’s name flash on my phone made me ridiculously fucking happy. I rounded the service counter at the hardware store where I was working and headed for the stockroom, tossing the pair of pliers I was supposed to be price checking onto a shelf. The customer would have to wait.

I ducked into the dusty stockroom and closed the door behind me. “Hey, angel.”

“Hi,” she returned, her voice whisper-soft.

“Everything okay over there? Brian?” As much as saying his name grated against my nerves, the guy had gotten pretty messed up in that accident, so I didn’t want to be a complete asshole and not ask how he was doing. Still, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me insane with jealousy that McKenna had put her entire life on hold – put us on hold – to tend to him and stick by his side. I couldn’t help but feel she’d chosen him over me.

I wished I’d had the balls that morning to take her in my arms and tell her I loved her. But instead I’d taken the pussy way out and scrawled it onto the window. There was a good chance she never even saw it. I sent her away into the arms of her very male best friend without even telling her how I felt. Basically I was a jackass.

“Brian’s doing fine. I think he’s annoyed at the slow pace of his recovery with his leg and his mom’s constant hovering, but considering how things could have turned it, he’s very lucky.”

“And how are you?”

She hesitated for several seconds before answering. “I realized some things this week.”

“And what’s that?” I wasn’t religious, but I prayed to God it wasn’t that she’d figured out Brian was the better choice for her and she was staying in Indiana.

“My parents’ accident wasn’t my fault. It was the damn reckless, irresponsible drunk driver.” Her voice wavered ever-so-slightly and she took a moment to compose herself. “I was talking to Brian’s mom Patty after the accident and it all just hit me. My actions that morning may not have made a difference in the outcome. And for years I thought maybe I should have been with them. But I see now that I wasn’t meant to go then. I’m here for a reason. I’m here to do good in the world.”

“That’s great to hear, angel. And you’re right. You had nothing to do with the accident.”

“I know that now. I can’t image how someone could be so selfish, so negligent. I will never forgive the man who did this. I have zero tolerance for drunk drivers.”

I was happy to hear her channel her anger into the right place – McKenna wasn’t responsible for her parents’ deaths. The man behind the wheel was. But cold dread slithered down my spine realizing, I’d never told McKenna about my own drunk driving arrest. Would it be a deal breaker for me and her?

“I’m going to be coming home soon,” she continued.

“Can I see you when you get home?”

“Yeah, and there’s something I have to tell you when I get back.”

“Something good or something bad?” I asked.

“Um, just something…different. About my life. I finally met with my parents’ lawyer.”

“Okay.” I had no clue where this was heading, but I’d follow her lead on this one. “See you soon, then?”

“Yeah. Goodbye, Knox.”

“Bye.”