Deadlock

Chapter Ten

Carmen had just finished showering and dressing and was considering the Chinese takeout menu in her hand when the doorbell rang.

She peered through the window by the door, and her heart jumped. Alec stood on the porch, a leather folder in one hand. He was simply but neatly dressed in jeans and a black button-down shirt, and she looked down at her own clothes. Cotton lounge pants and a tank top had seemed fine for an evening in, but not with company.

Especially company that had fucked up and should now eat its heart out.

She opened the door, but held the edge instead of inviting him in. «Alec.»

He didn’t even greet her. «I’m sorry. I’m a jackass, and I’m sorry.»

Franklin must have put him up to apologizing. «I said I understood, and I do.» She raised both eyebrows. «Is there something else?»

Alec closed his fingers around the edge of the door, as if he was afraid she might jerk it shut. «You can’t possibly understand. I don’t even understand.»

Looking at him hurt, so much more when he looked at her that earnestly. «I don’t know what you want me to say. I forgive you? Just…go away, all right?»

«I can’t.» Uncertainty crept over her — his emotions, tinged with something almost like fear. «It was supposed to be clearer without you, but it’s not. Just hurts more.»

Part of her wanted to slam the door and retreat to a place where he couldn’t wound her again. «I can’t do this, Alec. What happens in another week or two when you decide that yes, you were right, your life is too dangerous for me?»

«You’re not Heidi.» His fingers tightened on the door until the wood creaked. «I could have walked away and kept her safe, but I’m so fucking self-involved I never realized that none of this shit came to your door because of me. I didn’t put you in danger, but I can protect you. Let me protect you.»

Had he really thought he was at fault? «My family’s been interfering with my life and my happiness for years. It’s not you.»

«I know that now.» He held up his other hand, revealing a portfolio. «Jackson rubbed the proof in my face. Sometimes I’m stuck in my ways. I need to have the truth smacked into me.»

She swung the door open and let him in. «I don’t understand.»

Relief flooded the room. Flooded his face. He stepped past her, his shoulder brushing her arm. «Kat figured out who paid for the house where the witch brought you.»

She opened her mouth to ask him to explain, but a flash of memory slammed into her, stealing her breath. She’d talked to her father the day of her kidnapping, had stood in the too-warm spring sunlight and argued with him.

We’re not talking about political alliances, Dad. We’re talking about the rest of my life, and I’m not for sale.

I’m sorry to hear you say that, honey.

The sadness in his voice had held a finality that made her hair stand on end. And something else he’d said had been enough to scare the hell out of her. Enough to make her call Julio.

I have to go now, but I’ll see you soon.

«It wasn’t Cesar,» she whispered hoarsely. «He didn’t know what Julio was talking about because he had no idea.»

«Your father rented the house six months ago.»

My father. Call — call my father. Please.

Where do you think we’re taking you?

Her knees wobbled, and Alec caught her with one arm. He pushed the door shut and twisted the lock, then swung her up into his arms and carried her to the couch. «Carmen? Stay with me.»

The exact words she’d wanted from him before, and the circumstances under which they came now made her laugh. It came out sounding hysterical, so she pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes. «Franklin said it. This has been the week from hell.»

«Yeah, it has.» He settled with her in his lap, one hand rubbing between her shoulder blades. «And I haven’t made it any easier on you by being an asshole and a coward.»

«Shut up.» She’d had the week from hell, all right, and being in his arms had been one of the few bright spots in it. «I don’t want to hear about how stupid you were. Just tell me you’re not going to do it again.»

«I’m not going to do it again.» It held the ring of truth, but regret still lingered. His fingers spread wide on her back as he sighed. «I don’t want to lay anything else on you…but there’s something else you need to know. About your uncle, and what he’s been up to.»

«Uh-huh.» It had to be more important than kissing the side of Alec’s neck, but that was what she found herself doing.

«Christ, Carmen.» His knuckles brushed her neck, and his fingers slid into her hair. «How are you feeling? Magical crap mostly gone?»

Her body responded too quickly to his touch, and she didn’t care. She’d been hungry for him before; now, she was starving. «I feel better,» she answered breathlessly. «Good.»

His eyes sparked with an interest echoed in the subtle shift of his emotions. «Good’s good.»

There was nothing between them this time, no reason to turn and walk away. Carmen took his other hand, folding both of hers around it. «This is going to sound» No, she wouldn’t apologize, and it couldn’t be ridiculous, not with him looking at her like that. «I missed you.»

The corner of his mouth kicked up as he stroked his thumb up and down the side of her throat. «Don’t hear that very much from women who’ve spent more than a couple hours with me.»

«So you keep reminding me.» She tilted her head, baring more of her neck. «I think they haven’t figured you out yet.»

«And you have?» The callused pad of his thumb swept down toward her collarbone, then up the front of her throat. His fingers were warm against her nape. «What have you figured?»

She swallowed hard. «That you’re not crazy. You just hurt.»

His smile faded, and his hand stilled. «I think I’ve hurt so long that I might be a little crazy.»

Maybe they both were. It couldn’t diminish the heat that blazed inside her at the thought of his mouth on hers. «I’m an empath, remember?» Even as she spoke, Carmen reached up to guide his head closer. «I’d be able to tell.»

He froze with his lips almost touching hers, and no amount of urging could budge him. «What else can you tell?»

Dominance pulsed between them, and every beat of her heart answered it with growing arousal. «You want me to submit,» she whispered. «To let go of everything that isn’t you and feel.»

«Mmm.» His fingers tickled the back of her neck as he twisted his wrist, twining the damp strands of her hair around his hand. «Just enough wolf in you to bring it out. This isn’t a human game. It’s not about power. It just is.»

«I know.» He evoked it like no one else ever had, that quiet instinctive need to belong completely to someone. «It’s not control. It’s caring.»

«Always.» Hot breath spilled across her cheek as he shifted his lips to her ear. «It’s always about caring, but it can be about dirty goddamn fucking too.»

Blood roared in her ears, and her hands began to tremble. «You say that like they don’t go together.»

Laughter spilled out of him, low and dark. «Oh, sometimes they do. But not everything is about fucking.»

No, not everything. «Alec?»

He tilted her head back with the fingers curled in her hair, and his short beard lightly chafed her jaw as he pressed a kiss beneath her ear. «Yeah?»

«Sometimes, you talk too much.»

«That so?» His teeth scraped against her skin. «And here we are, doing the one damn thing I’m not half bad at talking about. But if you don’t like it…»

Before she could respond, he bit the spot where her neck curved into her shoulder, a rumbling growl of pleasure washing over her along with his intense satisfaction.

The forceful caress stole her breath, and she whispered a curse. «Just to clarify, we’re not starting something we’re not going to finish, right?»

«Not unless you decide to stop it.»

It was all she needed to know. She rose on shaky legs, his hand still clutched in hers, and tried to pull him up beside her. When he resisted, she growled and climbed onto his lap. «Maybe I’m going to bite you now.»

Alec just smiled and slid one hand around to the small of her back, edging her shirt up. «Take this off.»

Nothing less than a command. She watched him as she drew the thin cotton up, hesitating just before it bared her breasts. He narrowed his eyes, his gaze dark and hot, and she shivered and stripped off the shirt.

He leaned forward without a word and tugged his shirt up and over his head, baring tanned skin marked by one or two thin scars and the black ink that curled around his arm and the back of his shoulder.

She ached to taste him, so she traced the hard line of his shoulder with her fingertips, then followed the same path with her mouth.

An approving noise vibrated up from deep in his chest as he caught her hair in one hand and stroked the bare line of her spine with the other. «Gonna bite me or not?»

«Impatient.» She breathed the word against his skin. As soon as it was out of her mouth, she bit him — hard. He sucked in a breath. His hands tightened, one pulling her hair and the other dragging her hips to his.

He was hard under her, aroused. Nearly giddy with her own arousal, Carmen licked his shoulder before lifting her mouth to his ear. «You make me hungry.»

«Good.» He tugged lightly at her hair. «Come here.»

He kissed her, at once sating and inflaming that hunger. His tongue drove past her lips to slide against hers, his own ardor so deep and sharp that it shook her. She tilted her head, fusing her mouth to his, and battled the urge to lower her shields so she could feel every reaction that shuddered through him.

But she couldn’t keep them up forever, not like this. She broke the kiss, her head spinning. «Have you done this before?»

That earned her a hoarse chuckle. «Am I that bad at it?»

It took her a moment to realize what she’d said, and her cheeks heated even further. «Not sex. Sex with an empath.»

«Once.» His mouth found her jaw, and he left a trail of teasing nips down the line of her throat before dragging his tongue along her collarbone. «She wasn’t very strong. Couldn’t project at all.»

With his tongue on her skin, she could barely manage a husky murmur. «Then this might be different.»

«You holding back?»

«For now.» She licked her lips. «Unless…you want me to let go.»

He urged her head back again, and his mouth found the top of her breast. «Let go. Let me feel what you’re feeling.»

Her breathing hitched. If she did what he asked, it could be fast, maybe even rough, a blinding blur of carnal pleasure.

It might be like that anyway.

Carmen closed her eyes and released her tight hold on control. He’d leaned her back so far that the only thing keeping her from tumbling off his lap was the steely strength of his hand at the base of her spine.

He would hold her.

She arched farther, shuddering through her pleasure and his when her nipple brushed his mouth. Teeth scraped the tender bud, followed by the hot swipe of a tongue, so good it left them both groaning. «Christ, you like the teeth, don’t you?»

It was her turn to laugh, and she scratched her nails over the spot on his shoulder where she’d bitten him. «So do you.»

«Most places.» He closed his teeth on her this time, increasing the pressure until just a tiny bit more would have made her squirm away. Then the biting edge of his teeth vanished, replaced once more by the soothing heat of his tongue.

Most attentive men could gauge a woman’s reactions, figure out when to apply a softer touch here, a quicker stroke there. Alec was going beyond that, using empathic feedback to give her exactly what she wanted.

She could do that too.

He was new to the give and take of empathy, but she’d lived with it her whole life. She’d already felt his libido stir at the sight of her on her on her knees, submissive and eager, and she knew they wanted the same thing.

It was part of what made him perfect for her.

She moved slowly, climbing off his lap only to ease between his legs and slide to the floor. She knelt there, her hands resting lightly on his knees, and waited.

Something dark stirred in his gaze, feral and hot. «You’re cheating.»

«But you like it.» She trailed one hand up his leg and closed it around his belt buckle.

Alec dropped his hand to cover hers. «You wrap your lips around my dick, and there’s a good chance I’ll be fucking you over this couch. You ready for that?»

The image made her body throb, and she let the slightest hint of challenge show as she held his gaze. «If I get you in my mouth, I’m not stopping until you come.»

He smiled and released her hand. «We’ll see.»

«Yes.» And then he would know how quickly a storm of ecstasy could gather, how fast and hard it could sweep them away.

Carmen tugged open his belt and unbuttoned his jeans. Desire had built to a roar by the time she closed her hand around his erection, and she moaned as she stroked the pad of her thumb along the underside of his shaft.

He liked it, and it showed. In the twitch of his hips, the way his eyelids drooped and his jaw tensed. Small signs, so small compared to the vastness of his desire simmering just beneath the surface.

She used her tongue first, soft strokes meant to tease more than satisfy, and she trembled when a little more of his calm demeanor cracked, his fingers finding her hair.

He’d wait as long as he could to unleash the full force of his passion on her, and that only made her want it more. To see on his face and hear in his voice what she could already feel burning inside him.

«Harder,» she whispered, and rubbed her head against his fingers for a moment before sliding her lips around him.

His hand did tighten, enough to drag her head back up. Another crack in his control. His eyes blazed, and his breath came too fast. «Take off your pants.»

Carmen rose, her knees weak with anticipation. Her fingers fumbled on the drawstring, but the loose cotton fell easily, leaving her clad only in plain white panties. She half-wished she’d known to don something more provocative, but the feeling vanished when she met his eyes again.

Desire. Hot, pure desire that would burn bright enough to claim them both. «Those too, unless you want me ripping them.»

Yes. She gasped and clenched her hands into fists at her sides.

It happened fast. His hand curled in the fabric and yanked it away with one violent jerk. He pulled her down to his lap just as fast, her back against his chest and her bare legs spread wide over his jean-clad thighs.

His skin was hot against hers. She arched, need riding her with a grating, almost painful edge. «Bedroom?»

Instead of answering, he gathered her hair and tilted her head to the side so he could close his teeth on the curve of her throat.

Claiming. Marking her as his.

His.

Carmen cried his name, all thoughts of moving from that spot gone in an instant. «Please. Alec, please—»

He spilled her from his lap to the couch as he rose. «You’ve got until I get my boots off.» The words bordered on a growl. «Then I’m taking you where I catch you.»

One boot hit the floor, and she shoved her hair out of her face and stared at him. He was dead serious — and undressing fast.

She ran.

She made it to her bedroom, but not to the bed. He caught her around the waist and dragged her the last few feet, bending her upper body over the mattress. «I’ve only got one condom. I sure as hell hope you’ve got more around here.»

«In the medicine cabinet.» She laughed, giddy with anticipation and relief. «Lily just bought some. I’ll steal the whole damn box.»

His gruff laughter almost covered the sound of tearing foil. «I don’t know if that’s a warning about your stamina or confidence in mine, but it’s fucking hot.»

«I’ll have to steal them. I don’t have any that aren’t dangerously close to expiration.» She swallowed hard. «It’s been a while since — since I did this.»

Alec’s hand smoothed along her spine, down to her hip and then farther, curling around her thigh as he guided her legs apart. His other hand hit the bed next to her head, and he leaned over her until his voice came from behind her left shoulder. «Want me to ease you back into it?» Wide fingers slipped against her, pushed inside. «Or do you want it fast?»

She couldn’t answer at first, not with his fingers stretching her, intensifying the ache building inside her. «Don’t make me wait.»

His fingers vanished. His cock replaced them, hard and pressing into her, so slow, even though she could see the effort control cost him in the tense arm next to her, could feel it in his steely, unbelievable determination.

He needed to make her feel good, and the strength of that need sent her spinning. «This is what you do to me,» she whispered hoarsely. Then she came, pleasure twisting tight inside before exploding, shaking through her in a rain of fire and satisfaction.

One hard, startled thrust pinned her hips to the bed, and he groaned and slapped his other hand down on the mattress. Both fisted, crushing the quilt as his chest slicked over her back with every panting breath. «Christ, woman. Do you have any idea what that does to me?»

«No. Yes.» Carmen shuddered and bucked, desperate for more. «You’re the one holding back now.»

His hips rocked, a slow glide out and a faster, harder return. He nuzzled her hair from her ear and bit the lobe with a pleased noise. «No making me come before I get to enjoy being inside you.»

«Sex with an empath.» She reached up and clenched her hand in his hair. «It doesn’t have to stop when you come.»

His next thrust inched her along the bed. «Sex with a shifter means it just starts again.»

«See?» She pushed back against him and bit her lip when white-hot ecstasy rebounded through her. «We are perfect.»

He made a rumbling noise of agreement and straightened, dragging his fingertips over her shoulders and down her back until his hands found her hips. «Don’t hold back. Let me feel it all.»

It was a habit more than anything, rebuilding those walls. As soon as she dropped them again, she hissed a curse as the full force of his appetite swept over her. He yearned for her, hungered—

Craved.

Under it all, a fine blade of fear lurked, and Carmen made a soothing noise. «I can take you. You won’t hurt me.»

He began to move, and it wasn’t gentle. His fingers tightened, lifting her hips until every thrust rubbed her G-spot. Her hand slipped and her elbows crashed to the bed, arching her back even more. The next time he drove into her, the hot ache inside her twisted tighter, almost to the breaking point.

Almost.

«God, Alec. Please.» She was begging, and she didn’t care. It didn’t matter. Only him, inside and around her, so much desire. «So much—»

Satisfaction trickled through the pleasure spun out between them, and he whispered one word. Just one, rough and needy and without doubt a command. «Now.»

Ecstasy lashed through her, wrenching a scream from her throat. In that moment, she was completely, utterly open to him, and she relished it. He’d taken her, marked her skin and claimed her — and that made him hers.

Mine. More than a thought, and she felt it shudder through him a split second before he tightened his grip on her hips and dragged her back into a hard, unsteady thrust. Her orgasm had barely faded when his began, and with no barriers left she felt it too, every pulse, every spike, all of it in reaction to her.

If he hadn’t been holding her, she would have slid to the floor. Carmen turned her cheek to the light quilt, cool under her flushed skin.

Alec slumped over her, his elbows digging into the bed as his forehead dropped to her shoulder. «Jesus.»

Joy bubbled up in her chest and escaped as a laugh. «I think I figured out what our problem was.»

«We had a problem?»

«Mmm. Talking, and fighting.» Her brain whirled, and she laughed again. «Fighting this.»

He eased away, only to lift her up and lay her on the bed. «Seemed like a good idea at the time. Now I’m kicking myself a little.»

She rolled onto her back. «Don’t. Plenty of time now.»

«Mmm.» He crashed next to her, stretched out and hooked one arm over her waist. «I turned off my phone. New Orleans will have to survive without me for the night.»

It didn’t seem like the sort of thing he did often. «I don’t mind if there’s an emergency, Alec. With my job, believe me, I’m used to it.»

«Eh, if there’s an emergency, they’ll find me anyway. Can’t hide from psychics and wizards. But if it can wait, I’m going to make it wait.»

She traced one finger over one of the dark lines of ink that curled around his shoulder. «Thank you.»

«For what, honey?»

The stern, serious set of his face had relaxed, and it made it easier to confess the truth. «I don’t know yet, but I’ll think of something.»

A tiny smile curved his lips. «Down payment for what I’m going to do to you when I recover in fifteen minutes?»

«I think…for not fighting anymore.»

«I was never fighting you. You know that, right?»

No, he’d been fighting himself, his own demons and the magic that had bound her. But the end result had been the same. «Doesn’t matter.»

He caught her hand against his chest. «Yeah it does. One’s about not wanting to want you. The other’s about not wanting to hurt you.»

Carmen sat up and leaned over him. «I know who my family is. If you didn’t have any reservations about getting involved with me, then you just weren’t thinking.»

Alec shrugged. «Sure. I had reservations while I was wondering if you were a femme fatale sent to mount my balls in your trophy case. As for the rest of it, hell. If anyone should have reservations, it’s about my family. And yeah, I have my share of those.»

Because of his wife. Even if she wanted to talk about it, that was definitely a conversation for another time. So Carmen propped her chin on his chest and affected a sigh. «Shows what you know. I don’t even have a trophy case.»

His smile widened as he lifted a hand to toy with a lock of her hair. «So where do you keep them? Bookshelf? Bathroom cabinet?»

«Interestingly enough, I usually let men leave my acquaintance still in possession of all their most beloved parts.»

«Makes sense. We’re more useful that way.»

«Exactly.» He was a beautiful man anyway, but when he let his guard down and really smiled… «You’re gorgeous.»

He twisted his finger in her hair and tugged a little. «Not as gorgeous as you.»

Warmth unfurled in her belly. «You want to argue about that now too?»

«Maybe only a little. Unless you’ve got something else in mind?»

She feathered kisses over his chest, from one shoulder to the other. «Maybe. Since you still have all your parts and all.»

If he gave her the night, she’d take it. If he gave her more, she’d take that too, and worry about everything else — including both of their families — later.

After twenty-four straight hours of sex, sleep and a silent cell phone, Alec knew the blissful vacation had to end.

Still, he didn’t expect it to end with eleven voicemails. «Jesus.»

Carmen set an open beer on the table in front of him. «What’s wrong?»

«This.» He held up the phone with its damning message count. «Not sure if the shit hit the fan, or they really missed me.»

She bit her lip. «Just Jackson, or others?»

«Guess we’ll find out.»

First was a message from Jackson, an update that he hadn’t found anything. The next two were from Kat, both accusing him of having forgotten to charge his phone but not leaving any real information. He deleted the one from his father without listening.

The fifth message made him sit upright, apprehension unfurling in his gut. His cousin’s voice — the only cousin he actually liked, and the one who lived on a ranch in Wyoming. The ranch where the Alpha’s daughters lived.

«Hey, Alec. It’s Gus. Michelle wanted me to call and ask if you can bring someone named Dr. Mendoza up here to the ranch as soon as possible. She didn’t say much else, just that the magic stuff could be bad, and coming from Michelle…» He’d paused to clear his throat. «Well, it’s the stuff she doesn’t say that scares the hell out of me. So watch yourself, and be careful.»

Alec hung up the phone without listening to the other messages.

Carmen stood, one hand clenched around the back of a kitchen chair, staring at him. «Alec, what is it? What happened?»

He needed to stay calm. Not panic, and not make her panic. «You know about Seers?»

She nodded jerkily. «Of course. Shapeshifters with magic. The Alpha’s daughter is one.»

«Michelle Peyton. She sent a message through one of my cousins. She knows a little about what’s happened to you, and thinks it might be a good idea if you come up so she can take a look.»

Carmen’s chest rose and fell with rapid, shallow breaths, but she only said, «I’ll pack a bag.»

Damn it all. He could hide his alarm behind all the straight-faced stoicism he wanted, but Carmen would be able to feel it. «I overreact,» he said quietly. «Worrying is what I do. Doesn’t mean things are dire.»

«I know.» She smiled, a shaky expression that she didn’t try to hold. «I should probably hit Google, see how cold it is in New York this time of year.»

«Right idea, wrong place.» Alec shoved his chair back and rose. «Wyoming. Michelle lives on a ranch there. It’s a long story.»

«It always seems to be.» Carmen caught his hand and stared up at him. «I should have already thought of it. I, of all people, should know that feeling fine doesn’t necessarily make you fine.»

Alec leaned down and brushed his lips over her forehead. «No should-haves and could-haves now. I know someone who can fly us up to Wyoming tomorrow morning, first thing. If your stomach can handle tiny planes, that is.»

«I don’t get airsick.»

«Or nervous?» He tried to find a smile. To pretend everything was going to be fine. «Ever had a wizard pilot?»

«If so, I didn’t know.» She released him and stepped back. «Do you need to go home and pick up some things too?»

It would be easier to make all the necessary arrangements, but the thought was surprisingly unappealing. He didn’t like the idea of leaving her, especially if something might go wrong at any second.

And if it could go wrong at any second… Gus had said as soon as possible. «Maybe we could leave tonight. I’ll call my pilot friend and we can swing by my house and pick up my stuff on the way.»

The words startled her, but she covered well. «I’ll get my bag now.» She wrapped her arms around her body as she turned and walked out of the kitchen, leaving behind a faint echo of fear and guilt.

Alec wanted to follow her. Comfort her. Hold and soothe her, as if hugs and kisses could protect her from whatever magic might be curled inside her. Waiting.

A danger he couldn’t fight, and it made his skin itch. If he made it to Wyoming without driving himself half-insane, it would be a goddamn miracle.