Toxic

Chapter Thirty-Seven

If only alcohol actually made you forget. Instead, I figured it would do nothing more than remind me of everything I wanted to bury far, far, away —Gabe H.

Gabe

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled as we all piled into Wes’s Porsche and made our way back to campus. “For ruining everything.”

Kiersten cleared her throat. “Well, at least it’s a birthday Lisa won’t forget.”

Wes chuckled. “How’s that for optimism?”

“She hates me.” I banged my head against the window, “How the hell am I supposed to deal with both my dad and making sure Saylor knows that—”

I stopped talking.

Wes cleared his throat. “That…”

Lisa squeezed my hand encouragingly.

“That—” My throat constricted. “Holy shit, I can’t even say it out loud! No wonder she hates me.”

“You…” Lisa said slowly.

“Love.” Wes added.

“Her!” Kiersten smirked at me through the rearview mirror.

“I’m not two.” I pressed my fingers against my temples. “Does anyone have any ideas? Wes? You know how I usually tell you to stop being such a wise ass?”

“Yup.”

“I need you to forget I said that.”

“Nope.”

I groaned again.

Wes pulled into his usual spot in front of the dorm complex. “Look, Gabe, I can’t fix this for you. None of us can. And trying to figure it all out tonight is going to do nothing but stress you out more. The only thing I will say is… your time’s up.”

“No shit,” I spat, wanting to hit something with my fist.

“Gabe.” Wes unbuckled his seatbelt and turned around. “It’s time. You’re done being Gabe. You were never him to begin with. You’ve always been Ashton — a name doesn’t change someone no matter how hard you want it to. Your identity is found in your heart. Not your job, not your status, your name, what your major is, how much money you have. Your heart has been the same the entire time. So, be who you’ve always been.”

“So pick one?” I shook my head confused.

“No.” Wes offered a sad smile. “Fuse them.”