Irresistible Refrain

22

The bus ride from Atlanta to Orlando turned into six and a half hours of living hell. I didn’t see Lace at all, but thoughts of her in the back bedroom with War wearing that ring on her finger made me want to tear the hair out of my head.

I let out a loud sigh of frustration. Now that I’d decided to give up everything for her, she wouldn’t let me. If only I could just grab her and take her away, away from War, and away from the deception and drugs, maybe then I could convince her.

As hour bled into hour, I remained alone in the front lounge, settling for killing digital zombies on the bus game console, instead of going back and doing real harm to Lace’s drug enabling fiancé.

When the bus pulled up to the Contemporary hotel, I headed for my room without stopping to make small talk with anyone. The happiest place in the world my ass. It was jammed with parents, children, teenagers, and tons and tons of strollers. Fortunately my boots kept my feet from being maimed by errant wheels as I wove my way to the elevators. When the doors opened, I had to squeeze sideways to fit in. Though there was barely any room to breathe, it wasn’t half as crowded as my brain was right now. Crammed with thoughts of her. Of us.

But what more could I do? I’d said my piece. Lace knew where I stood. Now I had to wait, but I was not a patient man.

She’d better talk to War soon.

I cursed my bad luck that there wasn’t even a real concert to keep my mind occupied tonight, just a short set inside the Magic Kingdom that Tempest and Brutal Strength were obligated to do for one of the tour sponsors who had rented out the entire park for an afterhours affair for their employees.

Once I was inside my room, I dropped my guitar case on the floor and threw my sunglasses and bag on the white duvet that covered a king bed. A quick scan revealed an earth toned interior with modernistic décor similar to the lobby. Nothing to provide any real distraction. I crossed to the sliding glass doors and looked out at the view of the lagoon. I watched a parasail drift back down to the water before sliding my cell out of my pocket and dialing home. It picked up on the first ring. When she said hello she sounded out of breath.

“Hey, Mom. Did I catch you at a bad time?” I asked.

“No, sweetheart. I just came in from work and was cleaning the kitchen.”

I heard the sound of running water being shut off. “Are Miriam and Ann ok?”

“They are. Both made the honor roll again, but we’re all looking forward to the winter break. What’s up with you? I haven’t heard from you in a couple of days? You’re in Orlando, now, right?”

“Yeah.” I turned from the window and flopped on the bed.

“How’s Disney World?”

“I just got here. It’s a little surreal, I guess. Not exactly a rocker kind of place with all these rug rats running around.”

“I can imagine.” She laughed. “How’s Lace?”

Shit. She always had an alarming ability to zoom right in on whatever it was that was bothering me. “She and War got engaged last night,” I stated softly.

“Really?” The line was silent. “I would’ve thought that relationship would have run its course by now.”

I barked a humorless laugh. “Apparently not.” I rubbed a hand over the ache in my chest. “I love her, you know,” I admitted in a quick rush.

“I know.”

“How could you? I never said anything. Was it that obvious?” I worried.

“It was to me, but I’m your mom.” She sighed. “Seems like this has been building for some time. What are you going to do about it, Bry? Have you told her how you feel?”

“Oh, yeah, but it didn’t go over quite the way I’d hoped.”

“Well then, she’s not as smart as I thought she was.” A short pause. “I’m sorry, Bry. Maybe you should consider just letting her go.”

I’d been trying for the past two years.

“There are other girls out there. Any one of them would be lucky to have you. You’re a real catch.”

“Thanks, Mom. I’m glad you think so.” I glanced at my watch. “Hey, I’m sure you’re tired after your shift. I’d better let you go.”

“I’m ok. It’s great to hear from you, Bry. I’m so proud of you and all that you’ve accomplished, but I’ll be glad when you actually get to come home.”

“Me, too. Love you, Mom.”

After ending the call, I threw my cell down on the comforter and stalked to the minibar. After a quick examination, I slammed the door. Figured all this place would have was granola bars and healthy shit. I needed a drink.

An hour later, my left elbow was propped up on the bar at the Outer Rim. I looked out over the lagoon from inside the large open air atrium as a monorail whooshed through the building on the track above me. The bar was small and concave. It only sat four but all the seats were filled as were the couple of low loungers by the windows. Apparently being happy was easier with a little liquid lubrication. For me it was gonna take a helluva a lot.

I tried yet again to generate some interest in the blonde beside me. It’d been wishful thinking that she’d be able to distract me. Even with my mind blurry from four drinks, it wasn’t happening. She was too small on top, too curvy on the bottom, and the eyes and smile were all wrong. In other words, she wasn’t Lace.

I was so screwed.

The blonde took the cherry from her drink, pulled the stem off, and leaned in close. “Wanna see what I can do?” She gave me a flirty smile.

“Not really.” I was serious.

She didn’t get it. She laughed and proceeded to try to wow me with her tongue tying prowess.

Suddenly the hairs on the back of my neck prickled. I glanced over my shoulder. Lace stood by the gift shop, forgotten souvenirs in her hand as her wide eyes met mine she brought the pile of t-shirts she held to her chest like a protective shield and then spun away.

I squeezed the blonde’s hand. “Nice trick, baby, but sorry, I gotta go.”

“Wait,” she protested, but I ignored her. I threw a couple of twenties on the bar and hurried to the shop. As soon as I entered, I spotted her in the checkout line and called out to her.

Lace tensed before turning to face me. “Hey.” Her smile didn’t reach her eyes. “Pretty girl,” she commented.

“I didn’t notice.” I took a step closer to her.

“The only one you’ll ever love, huh?” Her cheeks reddened as she twisted the shirts as if embarrassed that she’d said that out loud.

“Yes, dammit.” I grabbed her arm and pulled her around the counter and over to a secluded corner, next to a bargain bin of Mickey Mouse swimsuits and flip flops.

“Have you talked to War yet?”

“No, not yet. He…”

I moved her backward. “You didn’t like seeing me with someone else, did you?” I grabbed her hands and pinned them behind her back forcing her to look up at me. “Well join the club. I don’t like watching you with him either,” I admitted in a growl.

Her eyes darkened with understanding.

“You need to talk to him. Today, Lace.”

She licked her lips and nodded.

I stared at her mouth. “I’ve laid it out to you how I feel, and I believe you feel the same.” She was fighting it though. She needed a push, and I was going to give her a big one. I came closer, crudely rocking my erection against her. “That’s for you, babe. I’ve been over there with that blonde, but the whole fucking time I’ve been thinking about you. It’s always you.”

Her breath caught. “Stop it, Bry,” she begged in a rough whisper.

“Give me a reason to stop Lace. Or I’m going to take that blonde upstairs and pretend that she’s you.”

She closed her eyes. I could see her pulse beating furiously in her neck. I held my breath waiting for her to answer.

“Excuse me.”

I let go of Lace’s hands and turned to look over my shoulder.

“I need to reorganize the suits,” a shop lady told us. “You two on your honeymoon?” she asked with a raised brow as she started to sift through the bin.

“No,” Lace replied before slipping past me and practically sprinting for the exit.

“Lace, wait.” I caught her by the elbow.

“Let me go, Bry.” Her voice was low and she looked flustered as hell. “I can’t do this right now. I’ve got a meeting with Mary Timmons. I’m already late.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“It didn’t sound like a question,” she rasped. “It sounded more like a threat.”

Fuck me but I liked the defiant glint in her eyes. “You know what I want.”

She shook her head.

So I spelled it out for her. “I want you to tell War it’s over. I want to be able to stop hiding how we feel about each other. I want to hold your hand so everyone will know you’re mine. I want to laugh and flirt with you again. I want to take you out on dates. I want to be the one in the back bedroom with you on the bus instead of him. I want to make love to you and then hold you all night long. I want to wake up next to you in the morning. I want you, babe. Just you.”

She closed her eyes. “I can’t give you what you want,” she whispered, but I saw the surrender written in her eyes when she reopened them, and I knew then that’s what she really wanted too.