Chapter Four

SARAH

I WASN’T SURPRISED THAT E was with someone, but I didn’t expect it to be his manager. She didn’t seem like his type. Even though she was around our age and seemed cool enough, she was definitely more uptight and professional than E, and E was just . . . E.

Derek seemed to relax a little when he discovered they were together, and that made me feel a little more at ease. I didn’t want this trip to be ruined by his perpetual bad mood over my past with E. Derek just didn’t believe that we’d only ever been friends. Unfortunately, that was a side effect of his own cheating, even if it was way in the past—he just never trusted anyone anymore. But I knew that dealing with his insecurities was part of dating Derek—it just came with the territory.

But still, if he wasn’t worried about E, we could all hang out, and that is all I wanted. I missed Damaged. Life on the road without those guys—and Cass, especially—had been a lot more stressful. Our band just didn’t mesh the way theirs did, especially with all the drama between Derek and me lately.

We slipped inside the Wet Room, just a few blocks from our hotel. I was so glad we had an entire two weeks to relax and hang with our friends before getting back on the road. I loved the stage, but we all needed some time to relax.

The thumping music pulsed through my body and drowned out any lingering thoughts of E. Derek slipped his hand in mine, pulling me behind him, as we navigated our way through the crowded bar. I wasn’t much of a hand-holder, but I was happy not to get lost in the throngs of people stuffed into the room. The bar had to be at capacity and it was nearly impossible to move.

We found a booth along the right wall, and Donna and I slid in as the guys went to order us a round. We stared out at the crowd of dancing bodies as the lights flashed red and blue over them. The lack of conversation would have been awkward if not for the loud music.

“It’s nice to get out of the hotel for a little bit,” Donna yelled to be heard.

I nodded and smiled as the image of her and E locked away in a hotel flashed in my mind. They had separate rooms and I wanted to ask her why that was, but it wasn’t my place. I didn’t know Donna well.

“So, you and E . . .” My voice trailed off.

She stared out at the crowd. “He’s a good guy.”

“Jesus, this place is fucking crazy,” Terry yelled as he reached the booth. Donna slid over closer to me in the half-oval bench seat so he could sit. E showed up with two drinks in hand as he looked down at me.

“Oh, sorry!” I slid out of the booth so he could slide in beside Donna. I stood at the edge of the table awkwardly for a moment before I sat back down, keeping space between E and me. E handed a drink to Donna and leaned closer to her ear to say something, and I wondered what they were talking about.

“Where’s Derek?” I yelled.

E turned to look at me before scanning the crowd and shrugging. “I think he went to the bathroom.” He slid his mixed drink in front of me. “Here. You can have mine while you wait.”

“Thank you.” I smiled over at him and my eyes fell to the hand that was resting on his leg. Donna’s hand. I picked up the drink and took a sip as I pondered their relationship. They didn’t seem like a good fit for each other, but E seemed happier than I remembered.

Chris came back and, without saying a word, slid in next to me, bumping my hip and shoving me closer to E until my side was pressed against his.

“Sorry!”

He turned his head toward me and our noses nearly touched. “What?” he mouthed, and leaned closer so my head was next to his ear.

The smell of his polo sport washed over me. “I said I was sorry.”

He pulled back to look at me, his brow furrowed, before placing his lips next to my ear. “You don’t ever need to apologize for touching me.” As he pulled back, he winked and turned to resume his conversation with Terry on the other side of the table. Such a notorious flirt. I shook my head—I swear he only did things like that to mess with Derek.

I grabbed my drink and sucked down half of it. My throat burned. It was practically straight liquor with just a splash of soda.

“I should go look for Derek,” I said to Chris, who was nursing a beer on the other side of me. He glanced down at me and back to his beer as he set it on the table.

“I’m sure he is just stuck in line at the bathroom.” His gaze flicked to Terry and there was some silent exchange.

I rolled my eyes. I hated when they communicated in code like that. “Whatever, just let me out, Chris.” E looked to Chris and nodded. Chris sighed and slid out of the booth so I could get out, just as Derek showed up at the table.

“Hey, this place is crazy, man.” Derek’s eyes were already glossed over, and he slipped in front of Chris and tapped my thigh for me to slide back into the booth. I did, pushing my leg flush against E’s as Chris squeezed in on the end.

“Where were you?” I asked as Derek ran his hand over his mouth.

“I was getting a fucking drink. This is a bar.”

“Where is mine?”

He laughed as he shook his head. “I may have drank it.” He smiled as he looked over at me, the smell of vodka on his breath. “What’s yours is mine, right? Or some such shit like that.”

“Fuck you.” I rolled my eyes as I laughed.

“Oh?” He cocked his head to the side and lowered his voice. “Right now?”

I felt Eric’s body stiffen beside me as his shoulder pressed harder against mine. “There’s ladies here, man,” he said loud enough for Derek to hear.

“I must have missed them.” Derek laughed again but there was no humor, and I knew he was trying to start a fight.

E didn’t take the bait. He shrugged as he grabbed Donna’s drink and drank it down. He leaned over so his lips brushed against the shell of my ear. “I won’t fight with him. You can relax.”

E always had the reputation of flying off the handle, but he wasn’t a bad guy and was actually a lot kinder than most in our business. Still, the endless fights after our gigs had earned him a reputation that wasn’t easy to shake. He was always the first one to shove a photog, freak out at an overzealous groupie, or even flip out at one of us if he thought the set didn’t go well. He just had a short fuse, and he seemed to be almost always on edge, especially lately.

I glanced over at him and his gaze didn’t waver. I knew he would keep his temper in check for the sake of our friendship.

“Who needs another round?” Chris asked, and we all held up a hand. “I’m going to need some extra hands. Help me out, buddy?” He stood and looked down at Derek. Derek nodded and slid out of the booth. I breathed a sigh of relief that he would have a few minutes to cool off.

“So . . .” Terry ran his hand through his dark hair with a smirk on his face. “He’s kind of a dick still.”

E laughed.

I narrowed my eyes at him. “He’s just stressed. We all are.”

“I’ll drink to that,” E said, and Donna laughed, laying her head on his shoulder.

“Maybe I should go back to the room. I’m not really feeling up to this.”

“You’re a rock star. Partying is in your blood,” Terry yelled.

“I’m just the boobs of this operation,” I joked, and rolled my eyes. E’s deep laugh shook his whole body against my side and he turned, flashing me a smile, revealing a deep dimple in his cheek. I couldn’t help but smile back at him.

“Why don’t we dance?” Donna grinned up at E, her bottom lip between her teeth.

My heart sank a little when he nodded in agreement. I didn’t want to be left in the booth alone. Terry slid out of the seat, and Donna and E followed him. As they began to walk off, E turned back to me and held out his hand.

“You coming?”

I looked around for any sight of Derek and Chris, but they were nowhere to be found.

“What have you got to lose?” E asked.

“My street cred,” I joked as I slid out of my seat and put my hand in his before I could second-guess my decision.

I thought he would drop my hand as I rose to my feet, but instead he curled his fingers around mine and pulled me in the direction that Donna and Terry had gone. His thumb ran softly over my knuckles as we navigated through the dancers.

Donna was dancing in front of Terry, who was already receiving attention from other women. I began to sway my hips to the beat of the booming base.

“I couldn’t find you!” Derek called from behind me, and E’s head snapped in that direction as his fingers slipped from mine. Derek lifted a cup over my shoulder for me to take.

“Thanks,” I yelled back as he put his free hand on my hip and pressed his body against me from behind. His hips began to move with mine as I quickly downed my shot.

Chris handed out the shots to the others, and they yelled cheers as they all tipped their heads back and drank. E only glanced over at Derek and me for a second before he pulled Donna against him and began to dance. She smiled as she looped her arms around his neck, her right leg between his legs as they moved against each other. E’s hands moved down her back as he whispered something in her ear, and she shook her head as her fingers went into his hair and she gazed up into his eyes. The moment suddenly seemed intimate and private, so I quickly looked away, feeling invasive.

Derek’s hands ran over my hip bones as he held me against him. “I’m sorry I was such an asshole.” His lips found my neck and I let my eyes flutter closed as I melted against his rock-solid chest. I knew he was trying, and that was all I could ask for from him. He had always dreamed of being a star, and having a girlfriend on your hip definitely wasn’t a part of that plan, but we’d fallen quickly and we’d fallen hard. The rest was rock-and-roll history.

“I forgive you,” I sighed as he nipped the base of my neck with his teeth.

“You’re too good to me.”

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